all quoted from a collegiate presentation called, “How We Did It” that I made to parents several times when I was teaching. All text is from “Hillbilly Elegy”.
Years ago, my son gifted me a book, “Hillbilly Elegy” by J.D. Vance. His was a more extensive experience of poverty than mine. I grew up in northern Kentucky while his Appalachian upbringing was a little over 100 miles away….from an area with a genuine Kentucky hillbilly life. I’m glad I didn’t have a foul-mouthed grandmother or drug-user family members in my family … but there were aspects of his young life that had recognizable similarities to mine.
How you can go from that to graduating Ohio State in 2 yrs and Yale is an impressive success story.
I’ve seen attack media describe his book as mediocre and that he maligned poor people — WRONG… he was describing his reality. And the book was made into a movie. (I liked the book better)
I used quotes from one page of his book in my “How We Did It” Collegiate presentation I gave to students/parents while I was teaching, because I totally agree with, and experienced via my younger son, the fact that you don’t have to be rich to get into a top-tier university.
With our younger son getting into a top-tier undergrad school and then an Ivy League grad school, our experience was in the same universe as Vance’s, hence my use of this quote from his book.
My recital was not in the recital hall at the Fine Arts building, but rather at the main concert hall at a prime-time-like time. It was surprisingly well attended, well past those who were required to be there. Joan was there.
I had a piano major friend play to give me a break (for endurance sake). He’s not on the recording.
I had a grad student for an accompanist for multiple reasons: The piano parts, especially for the Bernstein and the Nielsen, are extremely difficult. My professor was challenging to work with and most piano majors were afraid of him. I was too, but I had nowhere to go.
The recording (Soundcloud link below) is in a different order from the program because, right before I went out on stage, my professor knocked one of my clarinets off the table onto the floor and was doing instrument repair during my recital. Note that this is a nearly 50yr old recording, with microphone and recording to match.
Some notes about the pieces.
The Weber Concerto No. 2 Alla Polacca is probably my most favorite piece I’ve ever played because it plays to my strengths. I blew a note toward the beginning and was expecting my teacher to reach out with one of those shepherds hooks and pull me off stage…. but once I got past that, nerves settled. Other than ‘almost’ losing a note, I think I pretty much hit them all, including the last page which has notes going by in a sustained rate of @ 18 notes per second.
The “Messiaen” might be one of my least favorite of all time. If you listen, consider skipping that one. Professor studied at Paris Conservatory and all senior recitals had a French piece, it seemed.
The Nielsen Concerto is 20 minutes long…. as one of the most difficult cadenza sections ever. At least at that time, it was listed at the top of the difficulty of IU School of Music’s second semester senior list. Oh, and it includes a snare drum.
The Bernstein Sonata is cool. Part of the second movement (1:18) is 5/8 in 1 with the piano and clarinet playing completely different parts (4:50)and coming together. That was always high risk, but it came off well.
UPDATE: Be sure to read the parent comments at the end of this article.
Over a decade after high school graduation, he told his parents he was bullied as a high school freshman, not telling them at the time because he feared they’d make a big deal of it.
He DID go to a teacher who ignored or brushed aside his emotional plea. In his valedictorian speech at graduation three years later, when he listed the “Top 10 Things I Learned in High School”, one of them was…..
“….that my head really does fit in a gym locker.”
Still no response. This was before all the more recent publicity of the terribly negative lifetime impact that bullying can have….but
…there is no excuse for inaction. EVER!
Fortunately, this story doesn’t end tragically…. but that doesn’t make it right.
For a short time during my earliest teen years, without concern about walking to and into his home, I studied piano with a single guy who lived a few blocks away. During high school freshman year, I took lessons with a college girl who came to our school and went with me into a sound-proofed practice room. Later in high school, I would travel weekly to an area band director’s home for instruction. Concerns about safety transparency and reputation never came up.
But times are different now. Priests, coaches, and teachers are convicted of having inappropriate relationships with children and students, creating a sensitive and suspicious society that dissuades good teachers and students from participating in the time-tested tradition of individualized instruction.
The concept of innocent until proven guilty does not apply. No one can afford even an accusation. A School of Performing Arts that provides private lessons for area children put windows in all the classroom doors, instituted a parental sign-in/out procedure, and has a staff member walk in on every lesson every time. Band directors schedule lessons in busy offices or in large ensemble rooms full of distractions. College students video lessons with middle/high school students, not only for critique but also for security.
One band director told me that
…you don’t have to be guilty….an accusation can destroy a reputation and/or cost your job. And unfortunately, even after proven innocent, the doubts, questions and hesitations can continue to damage a reputation that took decades to build. Teachers have to be soooo careful.
The very nature of individualized music instruction almost mandates that student and teacher be alone in a room with a closed door. How do we take the legitimate safety concerns that student, parent, and teacher share along with the teacher’s concern for reputation (and employment) and still provide specialized, accelerated training?
SAFETY is everyone’s concern even if from different perspectives. Be aware and be careful.
TEACHERS…
invite parents to sit in or be nearby during lessons.
My experience: When I teach 1-1 lessons in my home, parents can relax in my living room while I work with the student in the dining room. A 6th grader’s mother would bring a book and sit in the room.
leave a door open or at least ensure it is unlocked and/or has a window. Enable anyone to walk in on you. That delay while you get up to open the door from the inside can cause undue suspicion or concern (and increase interruption time).
schedule lessons when others are around. Avoid evenings or non-school days when teaching at school or make sure someone else is home if the student is coming to your home studio. Do everything reasonable to remove any question andensure both student and parent are comfortable. Keep in mind that teens are increasingly cautioned to beware of one-on-one situations with adults. Respect that.
My experience: When a mother requested I work with her student over holiday break, I scheduled it at school along with an appointment for another teacher to drop something off to me during the lesson time. I left the band room door opened and set up the chairs in clear view from the hallway so passing janitors could see and hear.
video or audio record the session. Make sure everyone knows. Place the camera so both teacher and student are visible, but NOT in a way that makes the student uncomfortable or could set you up for a different kind of complaint.
My experience: When I teach lessons via Skype, I ask that the camera be pointed so that I can see either fingers, embouchure or both, so I am usually looking at a profile view of the student’s top front. When girls start adjusting their clothes, there is some discomfort. Be aware, empathetic, and be careful. Explain your reasoning — or move the camera to remove the discomfort.
if you have a regular coaching schedule, post the schedule. If you have a website with a calendar, parents (and students) are better reminded and informed.
PARENTS…
check references. In addition to safety, you want to make sure you’re getting a good product (teacher). If the teacher is an outsider coming to the school, the school should have conducted a background check. Ask.
sit in or be in the area, at least periodically. Sitting in an adjacent room can provide reasonable privacy while often enabling you to hear your child play. They won’t do that for you at home, right? Bring a book.
for virtual lessons (via Skype, for example), be in the area. You don’t have to stand over the child’s shoulder, but listen in and even walk in a couple times….say hi to the teacher.
STUDENTS…
meet a new teacher for the first time with a parent and in public.
go with your gut.
if anything makes you uncomfortable, speak up or get out. Nearly 100% of the time, you are either mis-interpreting or the teacher is completely unaware and will respond and adjust. Don’t destroy an opportunity based on your misunderstanding a teacher’s oversight.
if a parent is dropping you off, have a cell phone to call if the teacher is not there, you finish early (or going over), or you otherwise need parental pick up.
My experience: It was during a storm and I was mid-lesson after school when the power went out. Emergency lighting came on, but not enough to continue.
if you are going to a lesson, tell your parents (or someone) when, where and for how long.
My experience: I’ve had an unnecessarily disgruntled parent when I scheduled some after school coaching with a student who never got around to communicating and mom didn’t know what was going on ’til the student didn’t get off the bus. My mistake was assuming the parent knew.
TRANSPARENCYhelps everyone.
Sometimes there is a drop off in parental involvement and in student/parent communication during high school. Teens want more responsibility and independence and both parent and teacher should strive to help them in those areas. Assumptions often cause problems, however, and most issues I’ve ever experienced in the triangular relationship with parent and student elevate because somebody “assumed”. Several years ago, I gave each of my business office employees a personalized, engraved magnet that said, simply:
Assume Nothing!
TEACHERS…provide a list of expectations and policies.
Payment. How much, how often and what happens when they don’t. Are materials (music) included?
Cancellations when you cancel, when student cancels, how much notice and what if there isn’t any?
Minimum requirements; lessons per month, practice time, materials such as tuners or metronome, a functioning instrument with adequate supplies (reeds, etc)…
Privacy. Don’t share student/parent contact info or details about what happens during lessons. That is why they are called “private” lessons.
Communication. Be easy to contact. Determine whether your communication is to be with the student or parent. Any written communication with the student should be copied to a parent, when possible, including texts, emails or other types of media messages.
REPUTATIONS are slow to build and quick to crumble.
Students and parents need to realize how important that is to the teacher, especially when their very livelihood depends on it. Younger or single teachers need to be hyper-aware, but no one is too old, fat, bald or ugly for legitimate concern and caution.
Without an element of TRUST, this simply cannot work. Hopefully, the teacher has ‘earned’ some trust from both the student and the parental. It is unfortunate that we hear via national news when trust has been abused. That is horrible. But it is also a very, VERY small percentage of people. My advice to all…. in a nutshell:
I learned late today that May 20th is National Band Director’s Day. I’ve had several directors who have impacted me different ways.
ROBERT CROWDER took over some of the elementary school bands when my initial teacher (more, in a moment) worked out to stay at the high school. Mr. Crowder was the first black teacher I had any extended contact with. He was so nice and soft spoken. He taught me at 10th District in grades 6-7. I was in 8th grade, at the huge, inner-city @2500 student Jr/Sr high when MLK was killed. Racial tensions were sky high for a while, including daily walk-outs 10 minutes before school end by hundreds of black students. I didn’t experience it directly, but apparently Mr. Crowder did a lot to help restore a calmer atmosphere in the school.
SAMUEL SANDERS was my Jr High director in 8th grade. I was 1st chair, but always goofing off in rehearsal. He pulled me aside one day and said something like, “You’ve got a lot of potential, but you’re going to throw it all away if you’re not careful.” That impacted me and I changed.
JAMES COPENHAVER taught me in his and my first years. I was in 5th grade and he just got the job. He didn’t like the way I held my horn. He sat down next to me, quietly explained hand position while patting me on the top of my head with his college ring turned around. I have great hand position still. Freshman year, he pulled me aside to say, “I understand you want to be a band director. That means you will have to go to college and I know your family can’t send you. You have four years to work on that clarinet, so that, by the time you graduate, you’ll be good enough that schools will pay for you to come.” He was right. I have so many stories about him. To say he was a strict taskmaster might be an understatement, but he did so many things to help me along. He got me scholarships to summer camps and connected me to the best clarinet teacher (below) in the area. He left after my sophomore year. He taught me to always strive, not only for excellence but for the top spot. I tried to pay him forward when I taught. It was hard because his tactics would be problematic today….but I get enough notes and feedback from students and parents that I know I impacted some lives.
RICHARD FOUST moved up from the Asst position for my last two years of high school. He was a great jazz musician. Overall, he kept the band strong through my graduation.
ROBERT RODEN was my clarinet teacher throughout high school. He was also a band director. He had the first chair clarinetists from two other area high schools in his studio. (Senior year he gave the three of us the same solo for festival). Mr. Copenhaver convinced him to give me an ‘audition’. After listening from his living room lounge chair, he offered me lessons with a condition. “You’re pretty good. I can help you get better, but you can’t afford me. I have a bad heart and am not supposed to do much hard work, so if you will mow my lawn, shovel my snow and do whatever else I need around the house, I will give you lessons UNTIL the day you show up here unprepared.” I have tried to pass that forward, but it is hard to find that level of commitment in the lives of super-busy teens. Mr. Roden died in the Beverly Hills Supper Club fire in 1976. There were @160 deaths. My dad was off duty, but at the fire helping fire fighters.
WM HARRY CLARKE was my college band director. The day I walked into the Fine Arts building for a visit, there was a music major at the door waiting for me, calling me by name and escorting me to meet Mr. Clarke. I learned a lot about conducting and rehearsal technique from him. One skill I never mastered was his ability to always remember names. We had a huge band and he knew everyone by name. That is powerful.
PHILLIP MILLER was my college orchestra director and clarinet professor. He was a good teacher, not such a good human. Other than telling me he had wasted four years of his life on me (when he found out I was an education vs performance major), the most memorable takeaway for me was that, just before I would walk on stage for a solo performance, his words to me were, “Make them stand up.”
“If the notes are on the paper, it is your job to play ALL of them.”-John Gardner
Too often, when I have heard high school (and college) students perform a piece, there are then inevitable technical passages. Rarely do I hear long technical passages played cleanly and correctly. The word ‘slop’ comes to mind. The reason the performance contains slop is because the practice contained slop.
Here’s how a typical high schooler practices:
Start at the beginning
Play to the technical passage
Slop
Stop
Go back to the beginning and start over.
Repeat the above steps.
Cleaning technical passages
Stop repeating what you CAN play and concentrate on what you can’t. I suggest circling those 3-5 most problematic spots in a solo. Then, when you start to play the piece, instead of starting at the beginning, start with the problem passages. Play them first — and last, twice as often as the rest of the piece. Don’t always start at the beginning just so you can sound good.
Always, ALWAYS stop and fix it.
Break longer passages into smaller pieces
Play the first 4 sixteenths plus the first note of the next beat.
Do that until you can play it PERFECTLY 3 times in a row.
Play the next set of 4 sixteenths plus one note. Get it perfect 3x.
Play beats one and two. Perfect.
Play beat 3.
Play beats 1-2-3.
etc.
Slow it down, get it right, and then speed it up GRADUALLY.
Use a metronome (free apps available for iPod, iPad.
Start with a tempo at which you can play it perfectly.
Increase the speed on the metronome no more than 5 beats per minute.
Don’t increase until you are consistently clean and correct.
Change the rhythm. What you are doing is practicing small groups of notes quickly without playing all of them quickly at the same time. By reversing and changing these rhythms, you are playing different groups of notes quickly.
Play 16ths as if you’re playing dotted eighth/sixteenth combination, exaggerating the quickness of the 16th.
REVERSE. Now play pairs of 16ths as sixteenth/dotted eighth. This is harder to do.
Then play them as three triplet sixteenths and an eighth note.
REVERSE to play eighth plus three triplet sixteenths.
Practice your performance, record yourself, critique your performance, mark your music and repeat the above cleaning steps.
A youth baseball quote I recall from years ago comes to mine;
Musicians auditioning for acceptance or for music scholarships are working on prepared pieces — likely the same piece he/she is using for solo contest. An aspect of many auditions that are a challenge is the demonstration of sight-reading proficiency. Colleges want to know how quickly you can learn their music.
In most sight-reading circumstances, there will be time for you to preview what you are about to play. In a concert band festival, the sight-reading session involves 10 minutes to look over a piece (counting/clapping rhythms, checking out different aspects, before time is up and the judge is ready. Whatever amount you get, gage the time to get through the following:
Key signature. What key are you in? Finger through the scale. Look throughout and see if or how many times it changes during the piece.
Notes. Check range. If possible, sing or sound what you see…. Can you hear and sound what you see? Some people refer to those aural skills as “seeing ears” and “hearing eyes”.
Time signature. Does it stay the same or change?
Tempo. If marked, this should give you a general guideline, but keep in mind that is a performance tempo. For sight-reading, look for the most difficult passage that you will play, get a quick idea of how fast you think you can play it accurately, and use that as your overall tempo. Once you start, you don’t want to change the pulse depending on difficulty.
Rhythms. Scan for anything that looks tricky and take a moment to count, clap, sing or whatever — to get that/those rhythm(s) in your head.
Dynamics. Scan for them and then be aware as you play.
Stylistic markings. Staccato, legato, articulation, accents, etc. The tendency in sight-reading is to concentrate on notes, which are primary but watch for the other signs as you go. Like driving the car, staying on the road (notes) is important, but watching the road signs (slow down, stop, cross-walk, etc) are equally important to getting to your destination safely.
Once you start – DON’T STOP! If you miss a note, that one is history, you can’t go back and fix it … part of practicing for sight-reading (or for any performance) is to force yourself to continue.
Finding music to sight-read. Get books from other similar-range instruments. Pick random hymns in a church hymnal. Check the band director’s office. Go to the music library and pull out random pieces. For sight-reading practice, however, don’t keep playing the same piece(s), unless it is to prepare them for performance or to see how quickly you can perfect them.
Another important aspect to sight-reading is evaluation. If possible, have someone else listen to you and critique what you played. You may be playing a rhythm wrong that you will continue to play wrong.
Hope this helps. Add your comments or send questions.
Civil Rights ===> Affirmative Action ===> DEI vs Meritocracy
There were injustices, such as Segregation among other things, that needed to change. The Civil Rights movement introduced well-meaning programs and policies such as Affirmative Action (AA), which was to help minorities, females, the disabled and others.
All positive.
Bussing for School Integration was also a good thing in many respects. For equality at the college level, Quotas became popular. According to the US Department of Labor, AA was mostly about numbers. Now mostly ended, the Supreme Court struck down AA as a tool for college admissions because, among other things, AA was discriminating against qualified whites and Asians (mostly) to satisfy quotas without regard to merit.
The current emphasis pits DEI (Diversity, Equity and Inclusion) against merit-based Meritocracy.
Diversity: The presence and participation of individuals with varying backgrounds and perspectives, including those who have been traditionally underrepresented
Gender
Race
Age
Sexual orientation
Equity: Equal access to opportunities and fair, just, and impartial treatment
Equal opportunities
Fair compensation
Balanced training and educational opportunities
Inclusion: A sense of belonging in an environment where all feel welcomed, accepted, and respected
The opposite of DEI seems to be Meritocracy (is that like Aristocracy??). The Cambridge Dictionary defines Meritocracy as
“DEI is a gun pointed directly at the heart of the meritocracy”.
DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) sounds great. Diversity IS a good thing. Equity (feeling of belonging) IS a good thing. And, of course, we want Inclusion vs Exclusion. All components of DEI sound (and are) good, until they are used to inflict the bias they are supposed to end.
I am completely in favor of meritocracy, i.e. “merit” based vs anything else; race, gender, ethnicity, financial….).
My mother, a polio survivor raising 5 kids as a single mom and no car, never utilized government assistance based on her handicap or income. She did use a ‘handicapped’ placard in her car. Her graduating class voted her “most athletic” because she did not let her handicap hold her back. I learned from my mama.
My band director pulled me aside freshman year when he understood I wanted to be a band director. His advice went something like this,
“If you want to be a band director, you’re going to have to go to college. You’re intelligent, but you’re not going to get academic scholarships. You’re not athletic. You ARE decent on that clarinet…. so I want to tell you that your best chance of getting to college to become a band director will be to use these next four years to become good enough on that clarinet that colleges will pay you to come.”
I did. They did. That was meritocracy.
When I needed a new clarinet, my Dad said, “You raise the first 50% of the cost of that new clarinet, and I’ll pay the rest.” I don’t consider that welfare. It was assistance, but the goal required work and commitment. The music store would not give me that clarinet so I could experience equity and inclusion.
My high school clarinet teacher, who I couldn’t afford, made a deal with me that allowed me to do yard work for him in return for lessons. He said he would provide me those 1-1 clarinet lessons….
“until the day you show up here unprepared.”
That deal had nothing to do with DEI, it was all about merit.
I did get some financial aid for summer camps and college, offered because they wanted me.
I’m okay with programs that help everyone have a chance. I experienced poverty.
My “Tenth District” Elementary School (two blocks from the city line opposite downtown) was 100% white while “Third District” (Downtown) was nearly all non-white. Because there was only one high school in the city, diversity was automatic.
I am in favor of helping those with genuine need or who are disadvantaged in a real way. I’m in the “help-those-who-are-willing-to-work-to-help-themselves” camp.
But when it comes to getting the job or the position, I favor merit-based decisions. The world works on meritocracy.
Professional athletes aren’t chosen to satisfy a quota — if you’re good enough, you can earn the spot. Also, professional musicians (especially in orchestral settings) are chosen by audition and the best person gets the job.
A recent podcaster interviewed a DEI advocate for pilots who was pushing a “from the tarmac to the cockpit” program. I watch (too many) video shorts of plane take-offs and landings….many with all female and/or ethnic crews from around the world. Recently I watched an Arab airline with a hijab-wearing female working with a male co-pilot. I would like to think that each of them studied and earned their way. Would you want your pilot to be a DEI (‘Affirmative Action’ is out of style now) or “from the tarmac to the cockpit” placement?
Show me a MLB, NBA, or NFL team put together with DEI and, if I gambled, I’d bet against them.
It gets trickier in business where historical biases can harm or prevent merit-based success. Yes. Fix that….. but not by quotas, AA, or DEI.
Unlike many teachers, a high school band director can have a student for four years or more. Sometimes, the high school director is also the middle school teacher, so those students can have the same teacher for seven years. They come to the high school as curious freshmen and develop exciting dreams. Sophomores are excited about the colleges they will attend and what they will do. They want to go to the higher level, name brand universities for law school, med school, music school.
But then, sometime during Junior year, it seems, the realities of less than stellar grades and parents balking at the published prices of the dream schools begin to crush and shatter that earlier enthusiasm and optimism.
A quote I hear too often, and the main motivation for writing this book, goes something like:
“I really wanted to go to [Name Brand] University, but I’m going to have to go to [Community] College and commute from home – because it is what we can afford.”
What Crushes Their Dreams?
They are not stupid, but might be ignorant
When Middle School 8th graders become high school freshmen, they can have a glazed-eye look about them. They are coming from a smaller setting where they had pods and teams of teachers who spent significant time helping them not only get through the educational process, but also to smooth their often traumatic entrance into the teen years. Suddenly, they get to the high school where the building is bigger (easier to get lost), there are more people, more classes, they have more teachers who have less time to hold their hands and who will hold them to a higher level of accountability. They’ve been the big-dogs on the middle school campus and now are at the bottom of the high school heap. The good news is that most successfully navigate the transition and are set for success.
As they experience the increasingly specialized high school classes, they get excited about topics or classes they like. They develop big dreams. Often, by the end of freshman or sophomore year, they are going to go to the name brand school; Law School, Music School, Medical School. These are exciting times.
Unfortunately, factors can dampen their spirits and dash their hopes:
Classes are harder, expectations higher and grading is less forgiving. Students who have always gotten all “A’s” can encounter some grades they’ve never seen before. Most make the adjustment, but some become discouraged and give up.
They are negatively influenced by the mediocrity of the general student population. There is intense peer pressure to do as little as possible. Unless highly self-motivated, positively influenced by strong teachers or from home, the slide to do as little as possible progresses.
They struggle with seeing the long-term. When I talk to band freshmen about an award they can receive senior year, but that requires some things that they must do freshman year, one of the challenges is to get them to see that far ahead. If you want to see some rolled eyes and crossed arms, just try telling freshmen about the super high standards of top-tier colleges.
Some smart students will coast along – because they can. Students won’t get in trouble in a public high school for getting a B or C grade. No. The emphasis is on RTI, on intervening on behalf of failing students. Teachers are pressured to have a rigorous class and to do everything they can to pass everybody. The goals tend to center around aiming for that 80% mark. Teachers can be punished for having too many low grades, but are not rewarded for high grades, so by default, the idea of average and mediocrity, if not encouraged, are at least tolerated – and become the norm.
By the time students reach junior and senior years and begin to see the next level, their grades and past practices can knock them out of consideration. The problem is less that they couldn’t have done it than that they didn’t know. They’re not stupid, just ignorant.
They treat college prep the same way they treat high school homework
Just a few weeks into freshman year at his top-tier university, my son called to tell me about his first English class paper.
“Dad, I’ve got a grade on this paper that I’ve never seen before.”
When I asked him what he had done differently, the response was….
“I did what I always did in high school. I waited until the night before it was due and then wrote the paper.”
He discovered that the bar was set higher there.
I hear students discussing (or watch some of their social-media posts) about a paper they are writing for another class. Here are typical statements:
200 words down – 300 to go.
Half a page to go – if I increase the font and adjust the margins very slightly, maybe [teacher] won’t notice.
Does anyone have a paragraph I can borrow about…
The goal is not excellence, but average. Students demonstrate realization that the system’s goal is not to get an ‘A’, but to meet the assignment. We unintentionally encourage the problem by emphasizing meeting minimum standards or expectations. We don’t strive for excellence, but to meet or slightly exceed the standard, the minimum, the average. Administrators praise teachers when they can display on the big screen a graph showing their school ever so slightly ahead of the state average. The school where I teach celebrated receipt of a ‘B’ (one step up from average) rating from the state. No one talks about becoming the best school in the state. That kind of talk seems reserved for athletics and the arts, not so much for academics.
The GOOD NEWS is, that if the goal is to get into the community college or the big state university, that approach will probably work. But for these freshmen and sophomores with those big dreams of becoming the lawyer, the doctor, the engineer or the professional musician, those are not the “standards” that make it in the top tier schools – or in life.
They take what comes and go with the flow
Given their life history, why are we surprised? Teens coming into high school have had almost no control in their life story. They didn’t choose their parents, or where they live, or what economic condition they would endure. They have moved away from their friends as the parents get jobs or flee bill collectors. They are the unintended wounded in divorces and then have to “learn” to get along with parental “friends” or to have to go back and forth between parents. They have to learn to become brothers and sisters to someone else’s children. They have two and three bedrooms in different homes. Some jump from home to home weekly while others make a long summer move every year. The reality of single-parent households often includes a poverty component, or an absent parent working multiple jobs to try to make it. And what choice does the teen have?
By the time they get to high school, they are numb to relationship building. When they apply some of the standards and practices they’ve witnessed in their homes to their first boy/girlfriends, they experience similar traumatic results. Hearts are broken, and many erect shields of protection as a defense to both students and adults – including teachers.
So when the realities of their short-sighted focuses, crushed dreams and dashed hopes come to bear as they approach time for college decisions, they default into the same mode they already know so well. They just take it. They go with the flow.
According to the 4-digit serial number, my Selmer/Paris Series 10 clarinet was manufactured in 1967. In 1968, my hs band director told my mother I had to get one. Not optional. He might as well have told her I needed a Mercedes for my first car. Dad made me a 50/50 deal, and after selling lemonade to golfers and hanging ad papers on doors … I got it.
I used it all through hs. It got me Solo/Ensemble medals, traveled with me and Holmes Band to KMEA and MENC, to Murfreesboro, TN and Virginia Beach, VA…. to All-State Orchestra, to band clinic and select bands, to summer music camps at Eastern Kentucky and Morehead State Universities, and followed me to Europe/U.S.S.R. with the United States Collegiate Wind Band in the summer between hs and college. I had to replace it at UK bc the clarinet prof kept saying things like,
“That was awful. I can’t tell if it was you or that crappy clarinet.”
Anyway, I just opened packages of cleaning supplies, including swabs, key and bore oil, silver polish, swabs, disinfectant and more….. I want to see if it still has all the notes and speed it once did. Students have heard me talk about instruments with “speed buttons”.
Oh, working on my 1973-ish Buffet R-13 also. Both are considered “vintage” at this point.
For a short time during my earliest teen years, without concern about walking to and into his home, I studied piano with a single guy who lived a few blocks away. During high school freshman year, I took lessons with a college girl who came to our school and went with me into a sound-proofed practice room. Later in high school, I would travel weekly to an area band director’s home for instruction. Concerns about safety transparency and reputation never came up.
According to the 4-digit serial number, my Selmer/Paris Series 10 clarinet was manufactured in 1967. In 1968, my hs band director told my mother I had to get one. Not optional. He might as well have told her I needed a Mercedes for my first car. Dad made me a 50/50 deal, and after selling lemonade to golfers and hanging ad papers on doors … I got it.
Anyway, I just opened packages of cleaning supplies, including swabs, key and bore oil, silver polish, swabs, disinfectant and more….. I want to see if it still has all the notes and speed it once did. Students have heard me talk about instruments with “speed buttons”.