Perfect pitch means you can hear a tone or multiple tones and identify them. There was a girl in undergrad music theory class at UK who had perfect pitch. She described it as painful if a vocal ensemble was to lose pitch, i.e. go flat/sharp.
Another person I worked with professionally was a local band director wife. We could use her as a tuner, because she not only knew the pitch, but whether you were ever so slightly off. We would bring her in periodically to critique and the students always enjoyed trying to “trip her up”. But perfect means perfect and they never could.
In one rehearsal, without a score in front of her, she made a comment like, “The Bb7 chord at letter E is both wrong and out of tune. The altos have the ‘D’ (your ‘B’) and one of you is playing a Bb and another of you is playing the right note, but quite sharply.” We checked. She was perfect.
I do not have perfect pitch, but good “relative” pitch. It serves me well in two general ways. First, as a clarinetist, I can usually “hear” the pitch before I play it and so can come in on the right note/partial and on pitch. Especially when listening to a clarinet, I can usually tell you the note, but more because I know the different timbres of notes. An open ‘G’ sounds different than a ‘Bb’, for example.
It also serves me well in rehearsals as I have keen “hearing eyes”. I can tell if what I’m hearing is what I’m looking at in the music score. I established that when I would say, “Someone is missing [specific note]. If you don’t fix it, I will find you”, they knew I could, so sometimes, when I stop the music, look down at the score (to figure out what I heard and where it might be coming from) and focus my attention toward a section of the group I might find someone with his/her hand already raised to confess, “It was me”.
During a grad class, I had to stay after class one day because I was doing something the professor said I shouldn’t have been able to do and he wanted to find out how I was “cheating”.
His researched position was that you could only retain and re-sound about 8-11 random tones. To make his point, he emphasized why phone numbers are broken down; 260-786-6554 vs 2607866554 or that credit card numbers are “batched” in 4’s because we can’t remember 16.
Then for practical proof, he started playing series of tones. We were to sing them back and drop out when we missed. Not unlike a spelling bee, by the time he got to 12-13 tones, there were only two of us left. The other person dropped out and the professor, in a frustrated tone, asked me how I was “cheating”.
Working 1-1 after class, he noticed (I didn’t even know I was doing it) I was fingering my pencil. His conclusion, and I had none better to offer, was that I was “hearing tones in clarinet” and then “playing them back”.
What I did was not unique. I know of others who have trained their ears to hear specific pitches, such as an ‘open G’ on trumpet or a vocal “do” on ‘c’.
My dad was a 32-yr career firefighter, retiring as an Assistant Chief for a moderately sized, full-time department that had about 10 stations throughout the city. I recall a childhood time when my siblings and I were vising him at the firehouse. When the alarm sounded, he abruptly pointed to the wall, and said
“Stand right there ’til someone comes for you.”
Immediately, 10 doors (5 front, 5 rear) open, the intercom is announcing location and status, and people are hustling from every direction Twenty seconds later, the building is open, empty and quiet. One of the dispatchers invited us into his area while our mother scrambled to come pick us up.
As a small business owner, Ibelieve some of my Dad’s Fire Department practices could help Small Business when it comes to putting out fires. Here are 11 things Small Business and Fire Departments should have in common.
Fire Departments
The Facility is well cared for. There are assignments (often seniority based) for sweeping/moping, washing/waxing, cooking, dishes, janitorial, supply maintenance, inventory and more. Rookies get the grunt jobs, but everybody has assignments and responsibilities with accountability.
Saving time is paramount.Vehicles are always facing the door for quick departure. Driver doors are left opened. Boots and pants are kept close to the truck (or the bed) and set for the firefighter to step into the boots and pull up the pants. Coats and helmets are on the truck to be added en route. When the bell rings, things happen and seconds count.
Equipment is organized and ready. Hoses have been carefully cleaned, inspected and rolled, and tools have been cleaned and stored so everyone knows where they are. Tire pressures, water levels and fuel have all been checked and readied. Efficient access is essential.
Skill sets are in place for lots of contingencies (types of fires, whether people are at risk, etc). Sometimes things don’t go the way they’re supposed to.
Practice, practice, practice. They practice driving through the streets (need to know every street, location of every fire hydrant), practice moving through smoke and fire, climb ladders, spray water, use the tools, lots of speed tests, inspections and homework. Ready to perform.
Group and Individual Goals plus Assignments are clearly defined, understood and bought into. There is no discussion about who gets to shoot the water cannon or hook up the hoses. They already know who is primary and secondary in hose control or who is going up the ladder first. Avoid unnecessary drama.
Coordination, Collaboration and Communication are essential. Control the traffic lights, mobilize police, roll the ambulance if needed or in doubt, notify the hospital and street departments, hold the trains, and get the business owner on the line. My dad always said, “We’ll be there in under 90 seconds”.
The Chain of Command is absolute. On a fire fun, the police are in support mode. Everyone has expertise and input, but primary is to trust and obey, for there’s no other way.
The only pic I have of my dad at a fire and he is there in street clothes. As the Asst off-duty Chief, he’s there getting his hands dirty.
Firefighters know who they work for and will sacrifice to serve. When someone calls 911, firefighters will do what firefighters did on 9/11.
No firefighter is ever left behind.Period.
When the gig is over, get ready for the next one. The trip back to the firehouse can be exhausting, but some things can’t wait until tomorrow.
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Small Business
The Facility is well cared for. What does your work area look like at the end of a day? Are there water bottles, messy desks, stacks of mail and reports? Unless you have a fantastic janitorial staff, make assignments. Delegate. What is your expectation for facility cleanliness and functionality?
Saving time is paramount. When it is time to start, is everything ready? Is there an agenda, task list or to-do list for the day?
Equipment is organized and ready. Desks are clean, waste baskets empty, floors swept, restrooms supplied, light bulbs in, etc? When that important phone call comes in, you don’t want to have to spend time getting ready to handle it.
Skill sets are in place for contingencies. Have you cross trained employees so that you can still function if the secretary, receptionist or warehouse manager are out sick or otherwise unavailable? Can you still answer phones, respond to emails, texts, faxes or social media messages, know where to find records when needed to answer a customer call or complaint, load or unload the truck and know where to place or retrieve product?
Practice, practice, practice. Schools have monthly fire drills even though there hasn’t been a school fire-related death in over 60 years. They also practice tornado drills and, increasingly, active shooter drills. Hopefully they never encounter any of those, but if they do — they have a better chance survival because they practiced. Having a list of procedures or contingencies is good, but nothing is better than practice. Practice your cross-trained assignments.
Are Group and Individual Goals plus Assignments clearly defined, understood and bought into? When a fire fighter makes a mistake on scene, someone can die. Business is not usually life and death, but do your order fulfillment personnel understand what happens when they make mistakes?
One of the most effective practices I put into place was to bring in a salesperson to talk to our order fulfillment crew and explain to them what happens to his customer, his income and even their jobs when orders go out with too many errors.
Coordination, Collaboration and Communication are essential. You have administration, management, office and warehouse staff….do all the appropriate people know what you are doing? Do you?
The Chain of Command is absolute. Everybody needs to be on the same team, but there can only be one coach. Encourage and welcome input, but make sure the team understands that once a decision happens, debate ends and action begins.
Employees know who they work for and will sacrifice to serve. If they won’t go above and beyond for you, then you have a different problem. Strive to instill pride and earn loyalty.
No customer is ever left behind. Period.
When the gig is over, get ready for the next one.
Meticulously planning and preparing for, and then efficiently and effectively fighting “fires” is something both fire fighters and small business owners should be good at. Business should be ready, but not always “putting out fires”.
The purpose of THIS post is to encourage you to be READY and SET so that when the alarm rings, you are prepared to GO!
Thanks for reading,
JohnGardner@VirtualMusicOffice.com
I wrote a tribute to my Dad, the firefighter, and included description and picture from the worst fire he ever fought…. the Beverly Hills Supper Club fire of 1977 that took the lives of 165 people, including my high school clarinet teacher. I also talk about his Fire Chief experience with accusations and responses to sexism and racism. Read more….
Beginning instruments are designed for beginners. The bores on some of the brass instruments are smaller because of the lesser air capacity the 6th grader has. Keys on mass-produced woodwinds are designed to survive some falls and mistreatment.
Once a student gets to high school, they’ve been playing that beginning instrument for three or more years and, especially if they show potential, I start to encourage them to step up because at some point it will become the instrument itself holding them back.
My first two experiences involved siblings. I was out of college and teaching band when my youngest sister was in high school band. She needed a new trumpet and I was able to get one for her through the instrument dealer I worked with. My brother got to play my Selmer clarinet when I had moved to Buffet.
Not all my attempts were successful. When I approached one farmer-papa about a new clarinet, his question was,
“Isn’t that the clarinet you told us to buy?”
He had also challenged me when I said I wanted to spend 1-1 time with his daughter in individual instruction.
“Aren’t you the teacher?”, he asked. “Then why don’t you find a way to teach her without me paying extra money for you to do your job.”
He eventually became a very supportive father and band parent.
One high school clarinetist was really good. She was studying with me and was at the point where she needed better equipment. And, knowing her father’s job, I was confident finances were not a problem. I tried the “puppy dog close”.
I learned the “puppy dog close” in sales training. The idea is that you go to the pet store and the store owner offers to let you take a puppy home for the evening with the ability to bring it back the next day. The puppy never comes back.
This is before I was on staff at the high school, but I had a good relationship with the music store in Fort Wayne. I went and asked if I could borrow a Buffet R-13 (top-of-the-line) clarinet with the idea that I could bring it back in two days if I did not sell it for them. They reluctantly agreed.
The next day I was in the band room as students came in for rehearsal. I called that girl over, handed her the new clarinet and asked her to try it out during rehearsal. As expected, she was amazed at the difference. I asked her to take it home for the evening (along with the price tag) and bring it back the next day if she decided not to keep it. She walked in the next day with a check for payment in full. No commission for me.
I was with a student and her family at solo festival. She had worked hard, but struggled in the performance. The mechanics of the instrument were messing her over. Afterward, in the hallway, dad asked me how I thought she did.
“She should get a Gold (she did), but she was fighting that instrument most of the way.”
The next day she had a new clarinet at school. Turns out, papa went to the music store table and bought her a step-up instrument on the spot.
A high school student was taking private lessons and her teacher told me on multiple occasions that her instrument was “crap”. My understanding in talking with the student was that there were some family financial difficulties.
Partly because of her finances, I found a doner and worked out a deal with her instructor to give her lessons for a year. When I called her in to tell her about it, I told her I wanted her to make sure the doner got his money’s worth. There were tears and a promise.
The teacher reinforced with me how incredibly prepared she was for her lessons, but still lamented about the quality of her horn.
I asked for a parent/student/teacher conference and met with them one day after school. I told the parental,
“She is an excellent musician. For financial reasons, we set up lessons for her for a year. She is doing an incredible job with those and her teacher stresses how she is the most prepared student he has had. But [she] needs a better instrument. I don’t know the details of your finances and I can’t tell you how to make it happen, but this girl needs [this]. The music store will work with you, but this needs to happen.”
There were more tears — and a new horn.
That student is now a Band Director.
There were other situations over the years where I was able to help coordinate or provide private lessons or to help a student get better equipment to work with.
The director had been out for a few days, so I ran the rehearsals….and organized this prank. I wish I had zeroed on facial expressions. NOTE: No harm was done. Students exited one door, walked around and came back in another. We lost about 2-3 minutes of rehearsal. I wonder what it looked like on the CCTV monitors in the admin offices.
I prepared this list for one of my woodwind students and modified it some to include other instruments. There are links within this article to other articles I’ve written about literature selection, accompanists and the judging scoresheet categories.
Pre-performance
The basics. Music, instrument. People have forgotten both.
Solo Part – ORIGINAL for judge. Measures numbered.
Have you paid your accompanist? Customary, usually following performance. More about respect, preparation and appreciation for your accompanist, click here.
BRASS.
Valve oil
WOODWINDS.
Backup reed – in case something happens to yours that day.
Mouthpiece cap – Keep on when moving – protects and looks professional.
PERCUSSION.
Backup sticks/mallets.
Arrive at the school/venue about an hour before your performance time. Find your performance room and then you can go to warm-up. Don’t over-practice. Just review your challenging spots. Your ensemble should run through the piece. Note that these warm-up rooms can be noisy.
Performance Room
Arrive at performance room before your time. You can go in ahead of time (or anytime) and listen to other performers. Most in Group 2 will be h/s. If your accompanist is late because of accompanying someone else, just explain that to the door person or judge.
Have the book opened to your solo when you present it to the judge.
If judge asks questions, answer politely (as you always are).
Sit or stand. Your choice. I prefer standing. Judge may want to see your fingers, so don’t put the music stand directly between you and the judge. Be able to make eye contact with your accompanist.
Do not start until the judge tells you to. He/she may be completing notes on the previous performer. If permission received, play tuning note with piano – last chance to check your reed.
Be prepared to introduce yourself, your school, and your piece (title/composer).
When you finish, especially if there is any applause, a slight bow is appropriate to acknowledge. Applause is the audience saying thank you — a bow is your thanking them for the applause. Recognize your accompanist.
You will not get your music immediately – probably after the performer who follows you. You will not get your scoresheet. Those go to your band director at the end of the day.
The door monitor will write your rating on the wall schedule.
Performance categories (sheet may vary slightly)
A separate post with addition scoresheet categories ===> HERE.
Intonation. Are you in tune with the piano? With each other (ensemble)? Do you have individual notes that are out of tune? Accuracy to printed pitches.
Performance factors.Choice of literature, appropriate appearance (related to performance), poise, posture, general conduct, mannerisms, facial expressions. Formal dress is not required, but jeans with holes and advertisement t-shirts will not only affect the appearance score, but also — judges can decide much about you before you play your first note. You are “on” from the time you take your performance position until you exit.
Did I forget anything? Let me know so I can improve this post for the next time. And note that rules per state are different… I tried to be generic in that regard.
We had a Marching Band Drill Writer/Visual Tech who would use this instruction when talking about “horns up”. He wasn’t from Boston, but used that type of accent. Here is what he was talking about:
“Wait LONGA” means don’t rush it. Don’t move early. Wait until the last possible moment.
“Move FASA”. Once you move, move fast….like two film windows….. one you’re down, the next you’re up…. with very fast movement.
“Hit HARDA”. Without losing any teeth, stop the movement as if it hit something.
This graphic illustrates a scenario we all face, individually, in business, in school as well as in music ensembles. Most of us, at least once, have been to the edge, looked down, looked across and pondered the possibilities. It is easy to say you want to get better, but how do you make that leap to the other side?
Realize that not everyone WANTS to get to the other side.
Many are satisfied with the way things are, represented by this marching band member attitude:
I am okay where I am. I am not last chair, I can play my part reasonably well, I can pass the playing test. I see those people on the other side…..so much pressure, so much work, and for what? Band is a good social group. It is a good place to find a date, to make friends, to feel connected. I enjoy the bus rides, the longer the better. The band parent provided food at competitions is good and I like the freedom during the down time to hang with my friends and watch some other bands.
You are, after all, standing on solid ground. It is safe where you are. You KNOW where you are and are in your comfort zone. You look over the edge and see danger. You could fall, you could fail. You could get hurt.
WANT it….with everything that is within you.
You hear the musician who plays the more difficult solo or watch the marching band put on a crowd cheering performance. You see the elation at the award ceremony and YOU WANT THAT.
In “The Return of the Jedi”, as Luke Skywalker finally stands before his ultimate enemy, the Emperor says to the young Jedi who is viewing and considering his weapon,
You want this, don’t you?
Know that small, safe, baby steps won’t make it.
If you stand on the edge, look down and take a step, you will fall. The gap is wider than that and will require a running start LEAP.
Practice and Prepare to Perform!
Olympians don’t just show up at the games. Basketball players spend hours behind the scenes practicing boring free throws and doing exhausting repetitive fundamentals up and down the floor. The ice skater doesn’t decide at the start of the performance that a quad would be a good idea.
There is no short cut to success. You must be willing to pay the price.
The ice skater going for the quad is literally a “leap of faith”. There is never a guarantee of success, but repetitive practice, falling down, getting hurt, figuring out what went wrong and working harder to get better…..are necessary ingredients to establish confidence and competence to make the jump. A phrase I have used in rehearsals,
Like the ice skater who misses the quad, missing notes (steps, sets) in performance can hurt.
A good cartoon by Tone Deaf Comics illustrates part of this idea.
Commit to go….and then GO!
No more standing at the edge. No more looking down. No more considering the consequences of failure. Back up, focus on the other side, set your mind and then RUN hard at the edge. When the Israelites were crossing the river Jordan, the waters did not part until the priests feet touched the water, the point at which they demonstrated both faith and commitment (Joshua 3:14).
Once you commit to go, you have to “go all out”. Know where you’re going, practice and prepare, commit and go.
A few years ago, I was tasked with putting together a list of responsibilities of the head director at my school. This is a generic approximation of the band director position in a moderately large high school.
(c) VirtualMusicOffice.com
Note: 150+ extra trips to the school for over 700 hours, equivalent to 18 – 40hr weeks.
Although there is some overlap, the above chart does NOT include the 180 school days of time/teaching.
Major decisions
Show Theme / Colors / Logo
Show Shirts; including color, design, vendor.
Basketball Shirts; including color, design, vendor.
Summer Parade Shirts; including color, engraving, design, vendor.
Color Guard Outfit(s), Flag design + performance props
Marching band uniforms; color, style, material, accessories, company, when + financing.
Competitions
How many
Which ones
What class / Contest Classifications, i.e. Scholastic, Festival, Open, BOA, MidStates
Hosting
Overseeing all contest logistics
Marching Band, Winter Guard, Indoor Percussion
Photographer for Band Pictures
Major Trip. 3 Hotel nights. Last trip cost @$83,000. Includes decisions about who could go/not go based on payment levels. Refunds? After trip collections? Also 22hr bus travel and night-time hotel supervision during stay.
Show Props. Organizing, overseeing design, construction, implementation.
Assembly of carts for front ensemble.
Music and design adjustments and rehearse and clean a Class A competitive marching show.
Recruiting, hiring, funding drill designer, music arranger, Color Guard choreographer, specialty coaches and field instructor.
Communicate/coordinate with the middle school directors.
Overseeing Instrument Purchase Plan and Repair Contract for the Corporation
Seating Charts / Part Assignments
Parade Block
Marching Band inside
Pre-Game Marching Assignments / Select Music / Write Drill
Marching Drill Assignments
Multiple Fall and Spring Concert Bands
Basketball Bands (2 bands x @6 games ea)
Music Selection
Multiple Fall and Spring Concert Bands
Fall Marching Band for Holiday Concert
Jazz Band for 4-6 performances
Spring Concert Band Tour
ADDITIONAL TASKS
Band office work
Retrieve/file music.
Take care of reeds, oils, sticks, and other supplies students purchase.
Make minor instrument repairs. Coordinate more significant repairs with the music store rep, including pickup, return — and keeping students/parents informed of status.
Reserve buses for all band trips; parades, contests (see above).
Complete Facility Use paperwork for each time during the year that you need the gym or auditorium for rehearsals and performances.
Collaborate instrumental purchase plan with other directors and the corporation’s financial person
Register and arrange payment for all competitions, plus acquire field trip approval and buses.
Maintain grade book.
Write weekly schedules / TWIBs. (This Week In Band), plus daily Band Camp or rehearsal schedule.
Write and publish band handbook.Register for all contests, parades and festivals.
Keep attendance records for school plus rehearsals, performances.
Make Accompaniment and practice mp3’s for individuals and for playing test practice
Write, transcribe, transpose music to fill in special parts for marching, concert, jazz music
Grant writing School Policies Compliance
Oversee school budget, complete paperwork for both deposits and withdrawals and pay vendors
Design and print programs for concerts and banquets.
Determine and create awards, plaques and other recognitions for end of year awards banquet.
Maintain “needs” list for when someone asks, for grant-writing, or when opportunities arise
Publicity: Newspapers, school announcements, website, email blasts, etc.
Maintain online calendar for rehearsals, performances
Scan, post all pep band music for download to student iPads
Maintain social media sites: web/blog, Facebook, twitter, YouTube, instagram, google+, etc.
Maintain band data base with home and cell phones and email addresses for multiple parent/guardian families plus students with separate contact info.
Design reports/seating charts (marching band, 5 concert bands, combined bands, graduation band) / parade block assignments/drill chart assignments/pre-game assignments/squads/basketball band assignments…or labels for music folders, shirts, mailings.
Organize a pre-solo/ensemble contest practice recital
Organize free piano accompanists for students unable to pay
Classroom Activities
Schedule, conduct and analyze playing tests or challenges. Assign seating for ensemble balance.
Update daily classroom announcements: Include standards, birthdays, calendar updates and enough jokes to keep students watching. Music accompaniment a plus.
Keep classroom presentable and clutter free for use by a variety of classes, ensembles and outside groups
Find ways to meet state and/or national standards without sacrificing the performance expectation overload
Create, distribute, collect health forms and ensure 100% compliance and that forms travel with the band.
Specialty Ensembles
Supervise some of the auxiliary ensembles; drumline, sideline ensemble, winter percussion, color guard, winter guard
Approve creative recommendations for specialty uniforms, flags, props, etc and oversee construction.
Collaboration with other Staff
Coordinate with choir director for rehearsals involving students in both groups
Sharing instrumentalists with show choir backup ensemble, school musicals
Share room and equipment (i.e. keyboards, megaphones, uniforms, instruments) with other teachers, classes and groups
Guidance Counselors for student scheduling and to encourage promotion of the band program
Attend meetings
School required faculty meetings, including mandatory training, department collaboration
IEP and other school meetings on behalf of individual students
Band Parent Organization, including Executive Board, Officers Only and General meetings.
Fundraising projects
“Director Reports”
Collaborating with individual fee collection
Dealing with personality clashes and chaperone issues
Overseeing special committees; i.e contest, uniform, major fundraising
Design teams (drill/choreographer, music, uniform/equipment design) for marching band, winter guard and indoor percussion shows
School mandated parent/teacher conferences
Meetings requested by students or parents
School Board meetings involving related budgets and programs
Make emergency judgment call decisions / calls when a student is injured or having medical issues in rehearsal or away at competitions.
Select Drum Major(s): Includes training, practicing, recruiting judges and providing selection criteria
Organize conducting, college prep or leadership classes/seminars
Attend Solo/Ensemble festivals at District or State.
Encourage and organize solo and ensemble participants, recruit pianists, ensure adequate practice and provide most participants free individual coaching sessions
Assist in individual (participation fees, pay-to-play, fair share) collections.
Write letters of recommendation for scholarships, college/job applications
Assist with auditions for area honor bands and specialty groups
I’m confident this list is NOT exhaustive, and would love to add to this list with other activities/responsibilities you experience or know about in your school.
Over the years, I would share stories with my students. They really enjoyed my police encounter stories. I’ve consolidated all of them (I think) here.
Three cops in front of Salem house during father-in-law July 4th visit.
It was my second 4th of July parade at Eastern HS in Pekin, IN. That parade is the longest, continuous July 4th parade in the country.
This time, I’m married. And Joan’s dad is coming to visit.
I drove to Pekin (11 miles from Salem) to open the building but realized I had forgotten my school keys. There was not enough time to drive back to Salem to get them, so I went to a janitor’s house in Pekin. The janitor wasn’t there, but his wife was. I asked if I could borrow the school keys. She was very nervous about lending them out, but made me promise to bring them back immediately after the parade. Of course.
But, I forgot. The parade ended, the band put their stuff back in the school, I locked up and headed to Salem for dinner with Joan and her dad. I was almost there when I realized I still had the keys.
I rushed back to Pekin, over speed — and upset with myself, profusely apologized for being late with the keys, and then raced back to Salem.
I passed a car on the railroad tracks on the way into town but didn’t think much about it. I went three quarters around the courthouse square and up the slight hill that would take me to my neighborhood. I saw the police car parked on the side of that road, knew I was speeding, and concluded I’d be pulled over. I waited for the lights, but didn’t see any, so kept going.
As I was preparing to turn into the driveway of my house, there were suddenly THREE police cars (two local and one state trooper) behind my car with lights flashing. Not only was I making a great impression for the neighbors, but the large picture window in our living room offered a great view for Joan and her dad. GULP!
Only the local cop directly behind me got out of his car and came up to my window.
“Sir, I noticed that you passed a car on the railroad tracks and I was going to pull you over to talk about that. But, when I got turned around, I couldn’t catch you. And, then, you passed another car very quickly. They couldn’t catch you and called for backup. Are you okay?”
Once I explained who I was, i.e. a band director involved in the Pekin parade and the issue with the keys, he didn’t forgive me…..but he didn’t ticket me either.
The police left and I got to go in and discuss my terrifying first impression on my father-in-law.
“Did you forget to pay for your gas?”
This event happened in Huntington….and, once again, Joan’s dad is visiting.
In the 80’s, we had a Ford Conversion Van that was great for traveling with two young sons. It was not good on gas but had two gas tanks with a switch inside to go from one to the other. It could take a while to fill the tanks, so if I was at a station that had two pumps close enough, I would put a nozzle in each tank.
This was prior to “pay-at-the-pump”, so I would normally finish up and go inside to pay. I would tell the cashier I had “pumps 1 & 2”, but most of the time they already knew that.
On one particular day at a station just a couple blocks from our Vine Street home in Huntington, I can not recall whether I failed to ask or notify about the two pumps. I should have known there was a problem with the amount, but my mind really wasn’t there, for some reason. One of those reasons could be that Joan’s father was visiting. (Note: that he was visiting during my Salem story.)
From the gas station, I went home and was in our living room with Joan and her dad when there was a knock at the door.
The local policeman simply asked if I had forgotten to pay for my gas. I explained to him that I had, but then together we figured out I had paid for one of the pumps, but not both. I assured him I would take care of it immediately. And I did.
Don’t Mess With Texas
I was pulled over three times in thirty minutes.
The Fund Raising Association to which my company (QDP Corporation) belonged had its annual meeting/convention was in Houston Texas. I drove my 1978 Ford Conversion van and transported 5-6 other people. It was a comfortable way to travel and cheaper than buying that many airline tickets.
The convention ended at the end of a day (@5pm) and after loading up, we departed for the drive home. With multiple drivers, the plan was to drive through the night.
It was late into the evening when I noticed a police car going the other way on the highway make a u-turn after it had passed me. I didn’t think I was speeding, but as he caught up with me and turned on his lights, I pulled over. It was a town marshall who wanted to point out that I had a rear tail light out. No ticket. I assured him I would get it fixed — and we were on our way.
A few minutes later the same thing happened. U-turn, flashing lights, and a pullover. This time it was a city policeman (I don’t remember the city). Same conversation. Same assurance and we were off again.
Within thirty minutes from the first stop — it happens again. This time it is a Texas Ranger. He asks me to step out of the van and takes me to the back to show me the light out. This time I asked where I could get a light bulb this time of night. He said there was a truck stop a few miles ahead. I assured him we would stop. No ticket.
At the truck stop, we purchased the bulb and a screwdriver and made the repair. As we pulled out of the truck stop, the Texas Ranger was parked across the street. He did not pull me over again.
I did buy a “DON’T MESS WITH TEXAS” t-shirt at the truck stop.
A CDL helped….for a while, it seemed
For a few years at QDP Corporation, we had a large enough delivery truck that a driver had to have a “CDL” (Commercial Driver’s License). It required renewal more often than a regular license, but during the years I had one, I did not get a ticket when driving my car, even though I was pulled over multiple times.
It seemed like such a reasonable amount to pay for “ticket insurance” that I kept it going even after we sold that truck and I no longer needed it. But my luck finally ran out…and then it was worse.
I was required to go to a driver training session. It was run by a State Trooper and nearly all of the participants were truck drivers, complete with beards, bellies (I have that one covered) and a temperament that looked like they were ready to throw their chair at the Trooper.
After that, I allowed my CDL to expire and went back to a regular Driver’s License.
I’ve had a few speeding tickets over the years, but most of my violations are for not slowing fast enough coming into a town. I would turn off the cruise when the speed limit dropped, but would not always touch the brake and, therefore, if it dropped too quickly from 55 to 45 to 35….I would still be going too fast.
I do better now and haven’t had a ticket for several years.
Note: the remaining stories happened while I was teaching in Huntington
Nearly fired on the first day on the job?
My sons were in the bands between 1995-2001. During a Band Parent meeting, I let the director, Thaine Campbell, know that I had been a band director, was a clarinetist, and would be happy to help any way I could.
He started using me as a clarinet and woodwind sectional person during band camp. After my sons graduated, he added me to the “paid” staff for camp.
I was hired in the summer of 2005 as the part-time Asst Director. My first day on the clock was the first day of band camp. I was continuing to run sectionals, and on the first day of camp, the clarinets were with me in one of the special ed rooms.
A tradition that we had (which I had started earlier as a band parent volunteer worker) was to “nickel” the clarinets of the rookies.
NOTE: A nickel fits perfectly inside the barrel of a clarinet. It completely blocks the airflow and it is impossible to play. The ‘joke’ would happen when I would ask the group to play. Most of the rookies would react immediately and quickly figure it out. But others would fake playing, which we all knew they could not.
I asked the rookies to set their instruments in their chair and to go out into the hallway with the section leader for a few minutes. The section leader (usually a senior) was to tell them about expectations for camp, learning music, etc.
While the nickels were being inserted, the classroom door starts to open. Not wanting the rookies to re-enter too soon, one of the seniors ran over and slammed the door shut. When we finished, we opened the door for the students to return.
A minute or so after that, the principal, the resource officer (or someone in uniform), and a teacher were coming into the room with walkie-talkies raised, ready to call for backup. The teacher for that room had come into the school and was opening the door to her classroom when it was “slammed in my face”. Yes, it was.
The seniors took over and explained that it was a long-standing tradition and they misunderstood the door opening. Yes, they were protecting me. They could have said it was a tradition I started and a prank I was overseeing.
I bet that was a story often told during the rest of that band camp day. It certainly became one of my favorite “Storytime” stories.
Caught with a drum
The community chorus has been performing Handel’s “Messiah” every December for decades. Over the years, they have borrowed risers, music stands and lights, and timpani from the high school to supplement what they are able to get from the university.
I got a call requesting the use of just one of our timpani. I took my minivan over to the high school, backed it up close to the service doors, opened the back, and went inside to the band room. As I was rolling the timpani down the hallway toward the service area, I noticed a policeman standing just outside Door 34.
I went over and opened the door for him and immediately had to answer the question, “Who are you and what are you doing?”
All was well.
He explained that it looked suspicious to see a vehicle backed up to the large service doors with the back opened.
Surrounded in the parking lot
My report time for school has usually been after 5A lunch (about 12:15pm). Sometimes I stop on the way and pick up something for lunch. And since this was a marching band rehearsal day, I was parking in the west lot (tennis court side). From where I was sitting, I could see students in the cafeteria. It would be a great observation spot for someone with ill intent during student lunch.
It wasn’t unusual to see a police car come around from the front of the building. They do periodically patrol the parking lots, especially when they are looking for a particular car or checking parking stickers.
But then, I noticed this police car had stopped almost touching my rear bumper. About the time I saw the officer getting out of the car, another car pulls up and pins me in from the front. And then a third car.
I showed my school ID, explained my start time to work and they seemed satisfied and left. Apparently someone had called 9-1-1- from the area of the parking lot. Ok. Yes. I would want them to check that out.
It made a great “Storytime With Mr. G. story in band rehearsal.
Police and Bubble People
Over the years I have been pranked several times. Even though I have no trees, I’ve been Tee-peed multiple times (students were careful to lay the paper in ways that it was easy to clean up). They have chalk arted my sidewalks and driveway, window painted both house and van windows. They filled my car with balloons. At school I was even plummed (several hats with plumes on my desk).
The most organized and persistent group was “The Bubble People”. They army manned the porch and yard with those tiny green toy army men and vehicles, saran wrapped the front and back doors to the house, and would leave “notes” on my home or on my desk at school. I really struggled with finding out who they were. No one would “rat” them out. I don’t remember how I got the first couple names, but over time, was confident that I had discovered the group. Flute players. Of course.
I contacted a police officer I knew and asked for help getting even. He brought a friend, and so, during a rehearsal one day, a pair of police officers came into the room. I read a list of names and asked those students to step into my office. I went in with the police officers and we closed the door.
(I’ve wondered what the rest of the band students were discussing during this time. They were very quiet — probably trying to listen).
One of the officers started reading off “charges”…..
“You are in violation of statute 1234.B and statute abcd.x.”
The girls were getting anxious. When one of the officers unhooked his handcuffs, one of the girls broke down and the officer confessed, “Sorry, Mr. Gardner. I cannot continue…..”
I think my only response to the group was, “GOTCHA”. And they went back to class. I told the group:
“I just want you to know that I can take a joke.
As long as you are not disrespectful, and no property or individual is hurt,
I can take it. But know this. I also try to get even. And you have now witnessed an example.”
When I asked my high school Valedictorian son why he had chosen a particular top-tier university and why he was tired of being the geek.
I’m tired of being the geek. I’m tired of ruining the curve. I’m tired of people getting mad at me because I do the extra credit anyway. I want to go somewhere I can be normal; where it is okay to be an achiever.
Pressure surrounds teens.
Parents push them to do better. Teachers need performance data in the ever-increasing “prove-you’re-teaching-and-they-are-learning” world of government schools. The strongest pressure, however, can come from peers.
In handing out a “pre-test”, a beginning of a semester assessment to find out where students are on a subject, a teacher was explaining to the class.
“This is NOT for a grade. This is to help me find out where to start. If you already know most of what is on this pre-test, I’ll be able to give you higher-level work.”
A student in the class spoke up,
“Fail it!”
The message was clear.
“If we look like we know stuff, they will give us more. If we all fail the pre-test, we’ll get easy stuff to do. LET’S GO!”
Here is some of the unwritten peer-pressure-code of many high schools:
Go easy on the pre-test. Save your effort for the one that counts.
Don’t ruin the curve.
If you turn it in early, you make the rest of us look bad.
If the instruction says 500 words, don’t do 501.
Just do what you have to do to get the grade your parents won’t yell about.
Don’t study at home, practice at home or do extra research at home because they’ll start expecting MORE.
The teacher will adjust the level of work to the level of the class. We vote for easy. Don’t mess it up for us.
Share your work with us…. we’ll change a few words and get away with it.
Teachers are the enemy. Don’t be a “teacher’s favorite”. The only time you should be “friendly” to a teacher is when you need something – or when you’re asking for more time, etc.
Snitches get stitches. C’mon! Who’s side are you ON?
If they give us the entire class period to take a test – take the entire time. If we get done too early, they will start on something else.
Tell your teachers what they want to hear, even if you have to make it up.
Use up the entire limit: number of times you can be tardy, number of times you can be called out before discipline, number of assignments you can miss, number of low grades that will be dropped…..and then use your puppy dog eyes and maybe even a few tears to plead for mercy, forgiveness and another chance — after the limit is hit.
Below are a few of the pics/graphics I try to use to encourage a different path…..
This pic is from the goal line of Lucas Oil in Indianapolis. Indiana bands have state finals here. Drum Corps International and Bands of America have national finals here. And…. many of my students call me ‘G’…
I prepared this list for one of my woodwind students and modified it some to include other instruments. There are links within this article to other articles I’ve written about literature selection, accompanists and the judging scoresheet categories.
We had a Marching Band Drill Writer/Visual Tech who would use this instruction when talking about “horns up”. He wasn’t from Boston, but used that type of accent. Here is what he was talking about:
