We had a Marching Band Drill Writer/Visual Tech who would use this instruction when talking about “horns up”. He wasn’t from Boston, but used that type of accent. Here is what he was talking about:
“Wait LONGA” means don’t rush it. Don’t move early. Wait until the last possible moment.
“Move FASA”. Once you move, move fast….like two film windows….. one you’re down, the next you’re up…. with very fast movement.
“Hit HARDA”. Without losing any teeth, stop the movement as if it hit something.
This graphic illustrates a scenario we all face, individually, in business, in school as well as in music ensembles. Most of us, at least once, have been to the edge, looked down, looked across and pondered the possibilities. It is easy to say you want to get better, but how do you make that leap to the other side?
Realize that not everyone WANTS to get to the other side.
Many are satisfied with the way things are, represented by this marching band member attitude:
I am okay where I am. I am not last chair, I can play my part reasonably well, I can pass the playing test. I see those people on the other side…..so much pressure, so much work, and for what? Band is a good social group. It is a good place to find a date, to make friends, to feel connected. I enjoy the bus rides, the longer the better. The band parent provided food at competitions is good and I like the freedom during the down time to hang with my friends and watch some other bands.
You are, after all, standing on solid ground. It is safe where you are. You KNOW where you are and are in your comfort zone. You look over the edge and see danger. You could fall, you could fail. You could get hurt.
WANT it….with everything that is within you.
You hear the musician who plays the more difficult solo or watch the marching band put on a crowd cheering performance. You see the elation at the award ceremony and YOU WANT THAT.
In “The Return of the Jedi”, as Luke Skywalker finally stands before his ultimate enemy, the Emperor says to the young Jedi who is viewing and considering his weapon,
You want this, don’t you?
Know that small, safe, baby steps won’t make it.
If you stand on the edge, look down and take a step, you will fall. The gap is wider than that and will require a running start LEAP.
Practice and Prepare to Perform!
Olympians don’t just show up at the games. Basketball players spend hours behind the scenes practicing boring free throws and doing exhausting repetitive fundamentals up and down the floor. The ice skater doesn’t decide at the start of the performance that a quad would be a good idea.
There is no short cut to success. You must be willing to pay the price.
The ice skater going for the quad is literally a “leap of faith”. There is never a guarantee of success, but repetitive practice, falling down, getting hurt, figuring out what went wrong and working harder to get better…..are necessary ingredients to establish confidence and competence to make the jump. A phrase I have used in rehearsals,
Like the ice skater who misses the quad, missing notes (steps, sets) in performance can hurt.
A good cartoon by Tone Deaf Comics illustrates part of this idea.
Commit to go….and then GO!
No more standing at the edge. No more looking down. No more considering the consequences of failure. Back up, focus on the other side, set your mind and then RUN hard at the edge. When the Israelites were crossing the river Jordan, the waters did not part until the priests feet touched the water, the point at which they demonstrated both faith and commitment (Joshua 3:14).
Once you commit to go, you have to “go all out”. Know where you’re going, practice and prepare, commit and go.
A few years ago, I was tasked with putting together a list of responsibilities of the head director at my school. This is a generic approximation of the band director position in a moderately large high school.
(c) VirtualMusicOffice.com
Note: 150+ extra trips to the school for over 700 hours, equivalent to 18 – 40hr weeks.
Although there is some overlap, the above chart does NOT include the 180 school days of time/teaching.
Major decisions
Show Theme / Colors / Logo
Show Shirts; including color, design, vendor.
Basketball Shirts; including color, design, vendor.
Summer Parade Shirts; including color, engraving, design, vendor.
Color Guard Outfit(s), Flag design + performance props
Marching band uniforms; color, style, material, accessories, company, when + financing.
Competitions
How many
Which ones
What class / Contest Classifications, i.e. Scholastic, Festival, Open, BOA, MidStates
Hosting
Overseeing all contest logistics
Marching Band, Winter Guard, Indoor Percussion
Photographer for Band Pictures
Major Trip. 3 Hotel nights. Last trip cost @$83,000. Includes decisions about who could go/not go based on payment levels. Refunds? After trip collections? Also 22hr bus travel and night-time hotel supervision during stay.
Show Props. Organizing, overseeing design, construction, implementation.
Assembly of carts for front ensemble.
Music and design adjustments and rehearse and clean a Class A competitive marching show.
Recruiting, hiring, funding drill designer, music arranger, Color Guard choreographer, specialty coaches and field instructor.
Communicate/coordinate with the middle school directors.
Overseeing Instrument Purchase Plan and Repair Contract for the Corporation
Seating Charts / Part Assignments
Parade Block
Marching Band inside
Pre-Game Marching Assignments / Select Music / Write Drill
Marching Drill Assignments
Multiple Fall and Spring Concert Bands
Basketball Bands (2 bands x @6 games ea)
Music Selection
Multiple Fall and Spring Concert Bands
Fall Marching Band for Holiday Concert
Jazz Band for 4-6 performances
Spring Concert Band Tour
ADDITIONAL TASKS
Band office work
Retrieve/file music.
Take care of reeds, oils, sticks, and other supplies students purchase.
Make minor instrument repairs. Coordinate more significant repairs with the music store rep, including pickup, return — and keeping students/parents informed of status.
Reserve buses for all band trips; parades, contests (see above).
Complete Facility Use paperwork for each time during the year that you need the gym or auditorium for rehearsals and performances.
Collaborate instrumental purchase plan with other directors and the corporation’s financial person
Register and arrange payment for all competitions, plus acquire field trip approval and buses.
Maintain grade book.
Write weekly schedules / TWIBs. (This Week In Band), plus daily Band Camp or rehearsal schedule.
Write and publish band handbook.Register for all contests, parades and festivals.
Keep attendance records for school plus rehearsals, performances.
Make Accompaniment and practice mp3’s for individuals and for playing test practice
Write, transcribe, transpose music to fill in special parts for marching, concert, jazz music
Grant writing School Policies Compliance
Oversee school budget, complete paperwork for both deposits and withdrawals and pay vendors
Design and print programs for concerts and banquets.
Determine and create awards, plaques and other recognitions for end of year awards banquet.
Maintain “needs” list for when someone asks, for grant-writing, or when opportunities arise
Publicity: Newspapers, school announcements, website, email blasts, etc.
Maintain online calendar for rehearsals, performances
Scan, post all pep band music for download to student iPads
Maintain social media sites: web/blog, Facebook, twitter, YouTube, instagram, google+, etc.
Maintain band data base with home and cell phones and email addresses for multiple parent/guardian families plus students with separate contact info.
Design reports/seating charts (marching band, 5 concert bands, combined bands, graduation band) / parade block assignments/drill chart assignments/pre-game assignments/squads/basketball band assignments…or labels for music folders, shirts, mailings.
Organize a pre-solo/ensemble contest practice recital
Organize free piano accompanists for students unable to pay
Classroom Activities
Schedule, conduct and analyze playing tests or challenges. Assign seating for ensemble balance.
Update daily classroom announcements: Include standards, birthdays, calendar updates and enough jokes to keep students watching. Music accompaniment a plus.
Keep classroom presentable and clutter free for use by a variety of classes, ensembles and outside groups
Find ways to meet state and/or national standards without sacrificing the performance expectation overload
Create, distribute, collect health forms and ensure 100% compliance and that forms travel with the band.
Specialty Ensembles
Supervise some of the auxiliary ensembles; drumline, sideline ensemble, winter percussion, color guard, winter guard
Approve creative recommendations for specialty uniforms, flags, props, etc and oversee construction.
Collaboration with other Staff
Coordinate with choir director for rehearsals involving students in both groups
Sharing instrumentalists with show choir backup ensemble, school musicals
Share room and equipment (i.e. keyboards, megaphones, uniforms, instruments) with other teachers, classes and groups
Guidance Counselors for student scheduling and to encourage promotion of the band program
Attend meetings
School required faculty meetings, including mandatory training, department collaboration
IEP and other school meetings on behalf of individual students
Band Parent Organization, including Executive Board, Officers Only and General meetings.
Fundraising projects
“Director Reports”
Collaborating with individual fee collection
Dealing with personality clashes and chaperone issues
Overseeing special committees; i.e contest, uniform, major fundraising
Design teams (drill/choreographer, music, uniform/equipment design) for marching band, winter guard and indoor percussion shows
School mandated parent/teacher conferences
Meetings requested by students or parents
School Board meetings involving related budgets and programs
Make emergency judgment call decisions / calls when a student is injured or having medical issues in rehearsal or away at competitions.
Select Drum Major(s): Includes training, practicing, recruiting judges and providing selection criteria
Organize conducting, college prep or leadership classes/seminars
Attend Solo/Ensemble festivals at District or State.
Encourage and organize solo and ensemble participants, recruit pianists, ensure adequate practice and provide most participants free individual coaching sessions
Assist in individual (participation fees, pay-to-play, fair share) collections.
Write letters of recommendation for scholarships, college/job applications
Assist with auditions for area honor bands and specialty groups
I’m confident this list is NOT exhaustive, and would love to add to this list with other activities/responsibilities you experience or know about in your school.
Over the years, I would share stories with my students. They really enjoyed my police encounter stories. I’ve consolidated all of them (I think) here.
Three cops in front of Salem house during father-in-law July 4th visit.
It was my second 4th of July parade at Eastern HS in Pekin, IN. That parade is the longest, continuous July 4th parade in the country.
This time, I’m married. And Joan’s dad is coming to visit.
I drove to Pekin (11 miles from Salem) to open the building but realized I had forgotten my school keys. There was not enough time to drive back to Salem to get them, so I went to a janitor’s house in Pekin. The janitor wasn’t there, but his wife was. I asked if I could borrow the school keys. She was very nervous about lending them out, but made me promise to bring them back immediately after the parade. Of course.
But, I forgot. The parade ended, the band put their stuff back in the school, I locked up and headed to Salem for dinner with Joan and her dad. I was almost there when I realized I still had the keys.
I rushed back to Pekin, over speed — and upset with myself, profusely apologized for being late with the keys, and then raced back to Salem.
I passed a car on the railroad tracks on the way into town but didn’t think much about it. I went three quarters around the courthouse square and up the slight hill that would take me to my neighborhood. I saw the police car parked on the side of that road, knew I was speeding, and concluded I’d be pulled over. I waited for the lights, but didn’t see any, so kept going.
As I was preparing to turn into the driveway of my house, there were suddenly THREE police cars (two local and one state trooper) behind my car with lights flashing. Not only was I making a great impression for the neighbors, but the large picture window in our living room offered a great view for Joan and her dad. GULP!
Only the local cop directly behind me got out of his car and came up to my window.
“Sir, I noticed that you passed a car on the railroad tracks and I was going to pull you over to talk about that. But, when I got turned around, I couldn’t catch you. And, then, you passed another car very quickly. They couldn’t catch you and called for backup. Are you okay?”
Once I explained who I was, i.e. a band director involved in the Pekin parade and the issue with the keys, he didn’t forgive me…..but he didn’t ticket me either.
The police left and I got to go in and discuss my terrifying first impression on my father-in-law.
“Did you forget to pay for your gas?”
This event happened in Huntington….and, once again, Joan’s dad is visiting.
In the 80’s, we had a Ford Conversion Van that was great for traveling with two young sons. It was not good on gas but had two gas tanks with a switch inside to go from one to the other. It could take a while to fill the tanks, so if I was at a station that had two pumps close enough, I would put a nozzle in each tank.
This was prior to “pay-at-the-pump”, so I would normally finish up and go inside to pay. I would tell the cashier I had “pumps 1 & 2”, but most of the time they already knew that.
On one particular day at a station just a couple blocks from our Vine Street home in Huntington, I can not recall whether I failed to ask or notify about the two pumps. I should have known there was a problem with the amount, but my mind really wasn’t there, for some reason. One of those reasons could be that Joan’s father was visiting. (Note: that he was visiting during my Salem story.)
From the gas station, I went home and was in our living room with Joan and her dad when there was a knock at the door.
The local policeman simply asked if I had forgotten to pay for my gas. I explained to him that I had, but then together we figured out I had paid for one of the pumps, but not both. I assured him I would take care of it immediately. And I did.
Don’t Mess With Texas
I was pulled over three times in thirty minutes.
The Fund Raising Association to which my company (QDP Corporation) belonged had its annual meeting/convention was in Houston Texas. I drove my 1978 Ford Conversion van and transported 5-6 other people. It was a comfortable way to travel and cheaper than buying that many airline tickets.
The convention ended at the end of a day (@5pm) and after loading up, we departed for the drive home. With multiple drivers, the plan was to drive through the night.
It was late into the evening when I noticed a police car going the other way on the highway make a u-turn after it had passed me. I didn’t think I was speeding, but as he caught up with me and turned on his lights, I pulled over. It was a town marshall who wanted to point out that I had a rear tail light out. No ticket. I assured him I would get it fixed — and we were on our way.
A few minutes later the same thing happened. U-turn, flashing lights, and a pullover. This time it was a city policeman (I don’t remember the city). Same conversation. Same assurance and we were off again.
Within thirty minutes from the first stop — it happens again. This time it is a Texas Ranger. He asks me to step out of the van and takes me to the back to show me the light out. This time I asked where I could get a light bulb this time of night. He said there was a truck stop a few miles ahead. I assured him we would stop. No ticket.
At the truck stop, we purchased the bulb and a screwdriver and made the repair. As we pulled out of the truck stop, the Texas Ranger was parked across the street. He did not pull me over again.
I did buy a “DON’T MESS WITH TEXAS” t-shirt at the truck stop.
A CDL helped….for a while, it seemed
For a few years at QDP Corporation, we had a large enough delivery truck that a driver had to have a “CDL” (Commercial Driver’s License). It required renewal more often than a regular license, but during the years I had one, I did not get a ticket when driving my car, even though I was pulled over multiple times.
It seemed like such a reasonable amount to pay for “ticket insurance” that I kept it going even after we sold that truck and I no longer needed it. But my luck finally ran out…and then it was worse.
I was required to go to a driver training session. It was run by a State Trooper and nearly all of the participants were truck drivers, complete with beards, bellies (I have that one covered) and a temperament that looked like they were ready to throw their chair at the Trooper.
After that, I allowed my CDL to expire and went back to a regular Driver’s License.
I’ve had a few speeding tickets over the years, but most of my violations are for not slowing fast enough coming into a town. I would turn off the cruise when the speed limit dropped, but would not always touch the brake and, therefore, if it dropped too quickly from 55 to 45 to 35….I would still be going too fast.
I do better now and haven’t had a ticket for several years.
Note: the remaining stories happened while I was teaching in Huntington
Nearly fired on the first day on the job?
My sons were in the bands between 1995-2001. During a Band Parent meeting, I let the director, Thaine Campbell, know that I had been a band director, was a clarinetist, and would be happy to help any way I could.
He started using me as a clarinet and woodwind sectional person during band camp. After my sons graduated, he added me to the “paid” staff for camp.
I was hired in the summer of 2005 as the part-time Asst Director. My first day on the clock was the first day of band camp. I was continuing to run sectionals, and on the first day of camp, the clarinets were with me in one of the special ed rooms.
A tradition that we had (which I had started earlier as a band parent volunteer worker) was to “nickel” the clarinets of the rookies.
NOTE: A nickel fits perfectly inside the barrel of a clarinet. It completely blocks the airflow and it is impossible to play. The ‘joke’ would happen when I would ask the group to play. Most of the rookies would react immediately and quickly figure it out. But others would fake playing, which we all knew they could not.
I asked the rookies to set their instruments in their chair and to go out into the hallway with the section leader for a few minutes. The section leader (usually a senior) was to tell them about expectations for camp, learning music, etc.
While the nickels were being inserted, the classroom door starts to open. Not wanting the rookies to re-enter too soon, one of the seniors ran over and slammed the door shut. When we finished, we opened the door for the students to return.
A minute or so after that, the principal, the resource officer (or someone in uniform), and a teacher were coming into the room with walkie-talkies raised, ready to call for backup. The teacher for that room had come into the school and was opening the door to her classroom when it was “slammed in my face”. Yes, it was.
The seniors took over and explained that it was a long-standing tradition and they misunderstood the door opening. Yes, they were protecting me. They could have said it was a tradition I started and a prank I was overseeing.
I bet that was a story often told during the rest of that band camp day. It certainly became one of my favorite “Storytime” stories.
Caught with a drum
The community chorus has been performing Handel’s “Messiah” every December for decades. Over the years, they have borrowed risers, music stands and lights, and timpani from the high school to supplement what they are able to get from the university.
I got a call requesting the use of just one of our timpani. I took my minivan over to the high school, backed it up close to the service doors, opened the back, and went inside to the band room. As I was rolling the timpani down the hallway toward the service area, I noticed a policeman standing just outside Door 34.
I went over and opened the door for him and immediately had to answer the question, “Who are you and what are you doing?”
All was well.
He explained that it looked suspicious to see a vehicle backed up to the large service doors with the back opened.
Surrounded in the parking lot
My report time for school has usually been after 5A lunch (about 12:15pm). Sometimes I stop on the way and pick up something for lunch. And since this was a marching band rehearsal day, I was parking in the west lot (tennis court side). From where I was sitting, I could see students in the cafeteria. It would be a great observation spot for someone with ill intent during student lunch.
It wasn’t unusual to see a police car come around from the front of the building. They do periodically patrol the parking lots, especially when they are looking for a particular car or checking parking stickers.
But then, I noticed this police car had stopped almost touching my rear bumper. About the time I saw the officer getting out of the car, another car pulls up and pins me in from the front. And then a third car.
I showed my school ID, explained my start time to work and they seemed satisfied and left. Apparently someone had called 9-1-1- from the area of the parking lot. Ok. Yes. I would want them to check that out.
It made a great “Storytime With Mr. G. story in band rehearsal.
Police and Bubble People
Over the years I have been pranked several times. Even though I have no trees, I’ve been Tee-peed multiple times (students were careful to lay the paper in ways that it was easy to clean up). They have chalk arted my sidewalks and driveway, window painted both house and van windows. They filled my car with balloons. At school I was even plummed (several hats with plumes on my desk).
The most organized and persistent group was “The Bubble People”. They army manned the porch and yard with those tiny green toy army men and vehicles, saran wrapped the front and back doors to the house, and would leave “notes” on my home or on my desk at school. I really struggled with finding out who they were. No one would “rat” them out. I don’t remember how I got the first couple names, but over time, was confident that I had discovered the group. Flute players. Of course.
I contacted a police officer I knew and asked for help getting even. He brought a friend, and so, during a rehearsal one day, a pair of police officers came into the room. I read a list of names and asked those students to step into my office. I went in with the police officers and we closed the door.
(I’ve wondered what the rest of the band students were discussing during this time. They were very quiet — probably trying to listen).
One of the officers started reading off “charges”…..
“You are in violation of statute 1234.B and statute abcd.x.”
The girls were getting anxious. When one of the officers unhooked his handcuffs, one of the girls broke down and the officer confessed, “Sorry, Mr. Gardner. I cannot continue…..”
I think my only response to the group was, “GOTCHA”. And they went back to class. I told the group:
“I just want you to know that I can take a joke.
As long as you are not disrespectful, and no property or individual is hurt,
I can take it. But know this. I also try to get even. And you have now witnessed an example.”
When I asked my high school Valedictorian son why he had chosen a particular top-tier university and why he was tired of being the geek.
I’m tired of being the geek. I’m tired of ruining the curve. I’m tired of people getting mad at me because I do the extra credit anyway. I want to go somewhere I can be normal; where it is okay to be an achiever.
Pressure surrounds teens.
Parents push them to do better. Teachers need performance data in the ever-increasing “prove-you’re-teaching-and-they-are-learning” world of government schools. The strongest pressure, however, can come from peers.
In handing out a “pre-test”, a beginning of a semester assessment to find out where students are on a subject, a teacher was explaining to the class.
“This is NOT for a grade. This is to help me find out where to start. If you already know most of what is on this pre-test, I’ll be able to give you higher-level work.”
A student in the class spoke up,
“Fail it!”
The message was clear.
“If we look like we know stuff, they will give us more. If we all fail the pre-test, we’ll get easy stuff to do. LET’S GO!”
Here is some of the unwritten peer-pressure-code of many high schools:
Go easy on the pre-test. Save your effort for the one that counts.
Don’t ruin the curve.
If you turn it in early, you make the rest of us look bad.
If the instruction says 500 words, don’t do 501.
Just do what you have to do to get the grade your parents won’t yell about.
Don’t study at home, practice at home or do extra research at home because they’ll start expecting MORE.
The teacher will adjust the level of work to the level of the class. We vote for easy. Don’t mess it up for us.
Share your work with us…. we’ll change a few words and get away with it.
Teachers are the enemy. Don’t be a “teacher’s favorite”. The only time you should be “friendly” to a teacher is when you need something – or when you’re asking for more time, etc.
Snitches get stitches. C’mon! Who’s side are you ON?
If they give us the entire class period to take a test – take the entire time. If we get done too early, they will start on something else.
Tell your teachers what they want to hear, even if you have to make it up.
Use up the entire limit: number of times you can be tardy, number of times you can be called out before discipline, number of assignments you can miss, number of low grades that will be dropped…..and then use your puppy dog eyes and maybe even a few tears to plead for mercy, forgiveness and another chance — after the limit is hit.
Below are a few of the pics/graphics I try to use to encourage a different path…..
This pic is from the goal line of Lucas Oil in Indianapolis. Indiana bands have state finals here. Drum Corps International and Bands of America have national finals here. And…. many of my students call me ‘G’…
The first time this came up, I was working with a group of 9th grade clarinet students on finger dexterity and breath control. To do that, we were using a simple, one-octave scale they could all play. I didn’t often model my clarinet but had it with me for this rehearsal. We were working together, but I was also having them play individually. The progression of instruction:
Play the scale up and down, one octave – in one breath. Good.
Go one octave, two times in one breath. Got it.
One octave, three times, one breath. After a couple times – good.
Now, let’s go two octaves, one time, in one breath. Not too hard.
Two octaves, two times, one breath.
Two octaves, three times, one breath. “But Mr. Gardner, we’re going to have to go faster to do that.”
Ok. Your choice. Go faster and/or breathe deeper.
Here we go….
Two octaves, four times, in one breath. “Mr. G, a clarinet can’t go that fast.” (I loved hearing that).
I took my clarinet, played a THREE-octave scale up and down about 6-7 times in one breathe.
“How did you do that?”
Without any pause, I answered,
“My clarinet has a speed button.” I expected them to laugh, or to ask more questions, but every one of them took that answer at face value as in, ‘Oh….well, that explains it.’
I could not let them get away with that acceptance. I ripped off a 3 octave (or so) chromatic scale up and down multiple times, and then we talked about how I did that.
Did it look like I had to stop and think about what the next note was? Why not?
Did you see how close my fingers stay to the keys?
We discussed how we took that simple scale and worked on speed. Using that technique, and breaking runs into smaller groups, I was trying to help them grasp the concept of “Play Every Note.”
There is a sales technique called the “Puppy Dog” close. It gets is name from the puppy dog at the pet shop scenario:
A mother and young child go into a pet store to buy a dog. They find one, but mamma says it is too expensive.
The wise sales clerk invites the mother and child to take the puppy home for the night….with the offer to bring it back the next day if they don’t think it is worth the price.
They will NOT likely bring the puppy back.
I fell for that sales close with a car once. My wife wasn’t with me when I stopped on the lot (intentional, so I had a way out of a pressure sales situation). The smart salesperson invited me to drive the car home to show her. SOLD!
I used the “Puppy Dog” approach with a clarinet student (I will call her Sally). The first time I heard her play was in a middle school concert. I didn’t know Sally, but I noticed her. It was 2-3 yrs later when I convinced her parents to let her study privately with me. She had incredible musicianship but was hindered by a mediocre instrument.
When I would ask about a step up instrument, she always responded about how busy her parents were. Knowing her father’s occupation, I knew PRICE was NOT the issue.
The music dealer let me borrow a top of the line clarinet for a day, with return privilege that I was not expecting to utilize.
I took the clarinet to Sally’s band rehearsal at the high school, instructing her to play it in the rehearsal and then to take it home that night to practice with at home and either return the clarinet or payment the next day. She handed me the check for payment in full.
“I’m fairly certain that you’re the only high school band director in this part of the state that actually responds to e-mails from the public.”
Response
Thanks. I try to respond to most emails quickly. Comes from decades in the BUSINESS world. No matter what business you are in, including the business of education, answering email is basic courtesy-101.
From a business perspective
As a business owner, I am generally responding to a variety of email
– VENDORS. (Educational equivalent = Administrators). You NEED vendors and their cooperation and quick responses can ensure that you continue to get the products, services and support needed. A vendor can cut you off (fire you) and force you to look elsewhere for an opportunity to generate income.
– CUSTOMERS. (Educational equivalent = Students/Parents). You NEED customers to survive in business. An unhappy customer takes his/her business elsewhere. A disgruntled student gossips or quits band. A Parent withdraws support, pulls the child out of the program or contacts an administrator to complain.
– BUSINESS OWNERS. (Educational equivalent = Band Directors). Sometimes businesses who compete can also collaborate. For example, in the fundraising business, I will respond to a request from a competitor who needs some brochures that the vendor is temporarily out of, but I have on hand. And then, when one of my vendors is backordered on a product, I will ask a competitor if I can purchase some of their stock. A Band Director should always respond quickly to another Band Director.
There is more to school life than what happens during the academic day. Some academic teachers are also coaches or extracurricular sponsors. Coaches develop strong bonds with their athletes. Music and theater arts teachers spend considerable extracurricular time with students – evenings, weekends, summers. These teacher/student relationships are significant and life long impacting.
Is it ever ok for a teacher to LOVE students?
In a reunion with some of the students from my first teaching job, as they were sharing memories, one person put it this way:
“Come back to teach the students of the students you taught.”
I expected to hear some of the heart-warming stories and did, but one comment caught me off guard a little. As one was listing attributes he appreciated, he included…..
“…and your smile.”
What teachers do you remember most 10-20-30 years out, and for what do you remember them?
Band is the ultimate team.
Unlike a basketball team with its starting five, there is no bench in band. Everybody is in. Everybody is a starter. Few other types of groups will involve people from such varied backgrounds. There are children of doctors and lawyers performing with children of single-parents working multiple jobs or utilizing government help. There are the students who have their own cars and those who need rides, those with the iPhones and the free phones or no phone. You will find students in most bands from every church in the community and others who have never been inside a church.
High school provides a memorable time for teens and parents to be on the same team before graduation and the empty nest.
If only it were like that for all teens.
At this most critical time in their decision-making years, if teens can’t find love, acceptance, encouragement and support from parents, teachers and mentors, they will search for it elsewhere, often with disastrous results leaving them with consequences that change lives and crush dreams.
But even more than TEAM, band is FAMILY…
Most high school athletic teams are together for a “season” — maybe six weeks with a few more for preparation. Band meets in the summer, including band camp which can be 8+hours a day. Then there is every day at school with additional rehearsals in the evenings, plus the Friday football/basketball game and the Saturday competition.
…and more functional than some.
As I stood outside Door 34, she jumped out of the passenger side of the car and ran past me, teary-eyed, crying,
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
As she went by I saw the papa, for the first time, approaching me and angrily waving a piece of paper.
“How much of this schedule is mandatory?”
I paused, if only for a moment as I thought through his reaction to my answer…
“All of it.”
After grumbling something that I probably couldn’t repeat, he returned to the car and didn’t quite lay rubber in his exit. The daughter was waiting in my office, still crying and apologetic. I hugged her. How does such a sweet daughter have a parent like that?
There are loving parents who are working 2-3 jobs each, going to school and dealing with the challenges of large families – and it is somewhere between difficult and impossible for them to spend a lot of time at football games, parades and competitions. I get that. But what do you say to this parent?
“We need to pull [Benjamin] out of band because he won’t clean his room and he needs to learn respect. He loves band and so this is the only valuable thing we can take away to make our point.”
Or this one?
“Why should I pay money for her to spend time spinning a flag. There are no colleges that will offer scholarships and besides, what job is that going to prepare her for?”
Or to these students?
“Can you please give me something to do. I’ll straighten the library….anything….just don’t make me go home.”
“I have a job so I can earn the money for my band fee, and I keep hiding it, but my mother keeps finding it and taking it.”
“I have to quit music lessons. My dad found out I was using some of my job money for music lessons and says that if I am going to waste my money on that – I can start paying rent.”
“Please don’t try to introduce yourself to my dad. Please don’t. Please, please, please don’t. He is not a nice man.”
I want to share the LOVE they may be missing.
Educationally, the L-word is dangerous. Administrations encourage admiration and respect, but love is conspicuously absent. Understandable. Inappropriate teacher student relationships make national news and destroy lives. Elementary teachers can hug students, but by middle school it is to be a touchless relationship. I disagree.
Sometimes an appropriate touch, handshake, high five, tap on the shoulder or even a hug – can be powerfully effective in mentoring, consoling or encouraging. It doesn’t have to be physical. It can be listening and responding when others won’t.
C.S. Lewis in his book, The Four Loves, divides the Greek vocabulary for “love” into four categories: Storge (στοργή storgē) -affection, Philia (Philia (φιλία philía) – friendship, Éros (ἔρως érōs) – romantic love, and Agápe (ἀγάπη agápē) – charity.
None of those match completely what I’m trying to define. Storge (affection) can include the physical. Philia (i.e. Philadelphia – brotherly love) comes close but can include the sexual. Éros is obviously not appropriate, and Agápe, often interpreted as the love between Christians is also close, but gets into spiritual and that is not quite it either.
I “L” my students with a parental type. I see their potential and their youthful enthusiasm and I love that. I love their willingness to share with me things that they can’t comfortably share anywhere else.
“You are always the one to trust with issues like this because you treat us like people and not just another bunch of “teenagers”.”
juggle the extra rehearsals and activities with job and homework — and go for the best grades without parental encouragement or expectation
keep a positive attitude when others have parents involved and but they don’t
Nobody said life is fair. Those who endure hardships can be the better for it later. Trust me on that. As the oldest of five children raised in a single parent family by a polio surviving mother (and if you have no idea what that means, thank God), I understand poverty, but also how to work through it, with it, around it, and above it …. so cut me some slack when I don’t expect less from the less fortunate.
Students often impress me with friend choices and for the way they support and encourage each other. It is moving to see how friends and band members surround one who is hurting, physically or emotionally. With proper relationships established, teachers can be included in, or involved separately in similar support and encouragement – even of some personal issues.
I RESPECT students …
who work through moderate pain or discomfort without complaint
who have the musical ability to thrive, but can’t get the new instrument, or the private lessons, or go to the summer camps….or even stay in band, because of a parent who doesn’t see the value of band or color guard
expect more of themselves than their parents do
endure custody battles and try not to allow it to interfere with band
I hope these students appreciate how hard I try to make their situations work out.
And we have students whose parents are their biggest cheerleaders and amazing supporters…..
helping them earn the highest of Boy or Girl Scout honors
supporting their garage band
encouraging out of country mission trips
inspiring them to pursue the same vocation as the parent
or spending countless hours volunteering for band (committees, sewing, cooking, feeding, chaperoning, driving, etc)
We have CARING students who….
stand outside Wal-mart when it is below freezing to ring bells and play Salvation Army brass ensemble music
volunteer in nursing homes and with church youth groups in a host of different types of volunteerism
help raise money for those sick and injured
I am a retired high school teacher who appropriately loves, admires, and respects students.
We had a Marching Band Drill Writer/Visual Tech who would use this instruction when talking about “horns up”. He wasn’t from Boston, but used that type of accent. Here is what he was talking about:
