Girls Just Want To Have Fun

With all the current controversy in women’s sports (which I have been posting about…..), this showcases that in music, it is not about male vs female, it is about excellence. This girl is incredible with the number of different instruments/parts she is playing. and the tune…. well, you’ll get it. (Kudos to my son for sharing this video).

Girls Just Want To Have Fun Read More »

“Getting out of the rut” no longer works with teens

By John Gardner

RutsI came into a program that was stable, consistent, well-rounded — but with few exceptional accomplishments in marching band competition. I told them,

“If you keep doing the things you’ve been doing, you’ll keep getting the results you’ve been getting.”

I tried to use the analogy of “getting out of the rut”. It did NOT register. I now know why.

“Getting out of the rut” no longer works with teens Read More »

Special Education for High Achievers

The world is full of mediocrity. Have you ever had a student at the “other” end of the special ed spectrum? You know…. the end that also requires extra teacher input and attention; where it is just as challenging to keep this student engaged as it is the lower-achieving student? Why is the term “special needs student” only used at one end of the spectrum?

I once sat in on a public discussion meeting where a high-achieving group was challenging a scheduling change. I was shocked when I heard one of the presenters say,

We’re not here to teach the elite. We’re here to teach the masses.

Think about that.

It is as though we’re all about not leaving a child behind, but also about not letting anyone get ahead either. At the lower end of the proficiency spectrum, we have organized “special” education with additional classrooms and facilities, employing both certified and classified staff. We develop IEP’s (Individualized Education Plan) for about 12% of our public school student body (Institute of Education Sciences) and require all building teachers to accommodate each of those individual needs.

But what about the 6% of Gifted & Talented student(s), at the high end of the spectrum; those who ace the test, ruin the curve, and yet still do all the extra credit — just because it is there? For them, there are no additional classrooms and facilities, specially trained staff, and IEP’s. The easiest thing to do is re-assign them as “mentors” or “tutors” so that we can pull everyone into the mediocre middle. That is the educationally correct thing to do, but who does it help …. and does it also hinder? We teach to the middle and use the achievers to help. We love the star quarterback but not the star student.

Yes, let’s do all we can to help every student, but let’s help every student. Compare the long term benefits of our lopsided investment for both students and society. When you hear about the top technology and other highly skilled jobs going to students from overseas, where do you think those countries are investing? As we correctly strive to leave no child behind, may we also more aggressively assist the academic achievers?

There are teachers who recognize the high achievers and provide individual challenges. We do have “AP” (Advanced Placement) classes designed to better prepare students for college….. but which colleges?

As you listen to or read about politicians, lawyers or surgeons focus, on the schools they attended. Are state schools bad? That’s not what I’m saying, but many of them are teaching “to the masses”.

I went to both a large, inner-city public high school and a super-sized state university. I sat in freshmen writing and lecture classes with 200+ students in a lecture hall with a graduate assistant on a microphone who would never know my name. One of my sons, while a doctoral candidate at an Ivy League university, taught a freshman writing class with 15 students…. and of the three classes he taught, that was his largest. Am I claiming that not all colleges are created equal? YES!

School systems celebrate when test scores are slightly above the state “averages”. What is average? Mediocre? So, we’re all about being slightly above mediocre?

I’m tired of being the geek. I’m tired of ruining the curve. I’m tired of making people mad because I do the extra credit anyway. I want to go to a school where I can be normal, where it is okay to be an achiever.

I heard this quote when I was asking a high school senior about the choice of college. When the principal learned about his Valedictorian’s college choice, he shared his opinion:

Why not go to [XU], it is the biggest state school…..everybody goes there. It is affordable. Why out of state at such an expensive school?

I know because I talk to both students and parents, that the experience of the student quoted above is not unique.

Low achievers are helped. High achievers are heckled.

My parental experience raising two high achieving academic students is that:

…for us the system worked, but we had to work the system.

With the attitude and determination evidenced by the geek quote, he chose Duke. His SAT score was slightly above the “average” there. He went in as one of nearly 500 high school valedictorians and graduated in the top 1%, but that was okay there, where he was expected to achieve and encouraged to excel. Unlike public high schools, which must take everybody and do the best they can to educate all…..there are schools, both high school and college, that specialize. Here is a paragraph from one such school’s admissions brochure(emphasis mine):

    We want to find the ambitious and the curious, students who want to tackle issues head-on and are open to change. Ours is a community of talented learners, and we look for people who have unique qualities, who can challenge us as much as we challenge them. We want some bumps. We want some students who are well-rounded, some with sharp edges. We want people who are not afraid to undertake things that are messy, complex, and extremely difficult to do well—because they love it. We like students who already know what it means to succeed and those who know what it means to reach and not succeed and reach again. We like students who make intelligent and interesting mistakes, students who understand that only in risking failure do we become stronger, better, and smarter.

Let me be clear. We could not have afforded to pay the $58,000 sticker price of a [“top tier”] University education. As I was balking at the “early decision contract” on the admissions office table, they responded to my financial panic with:

If we decide we want him, we will get him here.

And they did. They didn’t make it cheap and they didn’t make it easy, but they DID make it possible for us to pay less than what we would have paid for an in-state public university. Our total contribution for eight years of college for two was about $32,000. Our total contribution for eight years of college for two was about $32,000. That’s $2,000 per semester. Where can you go to a school for a price like that?

All education should be “special”, right?

Thanks for reading,
John@VirtualMusicOffice.com

ps Every time I’ve written about variations of this topic, I get blasted with negative feedback. The goal is not arrogance or elitism, but to encourage those who ARE achievers, or who want to be by pointing out that there are solutions for you too. And….to dispel the myths that college is all about who can afford what. Here are my bullet points:

  • Don’t choose the cheapest school based on $$$
  • Good Grades Do Pay
  • Be proactive vs reactive; make it happen, don’t just let it happen. Plan it, don’t wing it.
    • Plan Academically
    • Plan Financially
    • Plan to be Well-Rounded
    • Plan to Know before you GO

Special Education for High Achievers Read More »

Private lessons can be like paying for college…1 week at a time

By John Gardner

I was sitting in the driveway of my son’s trumpet teacher writing out a check.

The teacher had requested going from a half hour lesson to an hour. I recall the teacher’s response when I asked if there was a discount for the double-session…..

You get me for twice the time at twice the price.

As I wrote out the check, I shared a sentiment with my son,

I consider this an investment in your college career. I hope I am paying for your college one week at a time….and by the time you’re ready to graduate that you will be good enough that a college will pay for you.

He worked — and his did. This video is a portion of his senior recital. He had the flashy stuff too, but I thought his tone was fantastic….. I had the honor of guest conducting his high school band, which accompanied him on this same piece during his high school final semester.

https://youtu.be/ok9YbPyMcf4

Private lessons (coaching / mentoring) provides much more than that…

…even for students who will NOT be majoring in music in college. …

Private lessons can be like paying for college…1 week at a time Read More »

I complimented her smile and ran into wokeness

After watching a TED talk by a North Korean defector, I became interested in hearing more about NK and started watching about 3 different youtube channels. I also bought one book by one of the presenters as they tell heart-wrenching stories of escape, some traveling through multiple countries to get from North to South Korea, or to America. Many are sex trafficked; bought and sold as payment for passage.
One presenter was telling how amazing her American friends have been after finding out she is from NK. After watching her happy presentation, I commented that she had a pretty smile — and ran into some wokeness.
I wrote a post and included several of the comments. Most were to my defense, thankfully.
I have taught in a h/s setting for a couple decades and know how sensitive teens can be. I’ve always tried to be careful, but (WARNING…..) I have complimented both guys and girls and have even touched or (a couple times) hugged as part of comforting, encouraging, etc. There has never been a complaint from a student or a parent. So THIS encounter caught me a little off guard.
I also included my comment about the NK orchestra conductor shot 90 times in front of the artists — and received several hundred “thumbs up”.
I’d be interested to hear your thoughts, even if it is to tell me I should never say a nice thing to (especially) young women.

I complimented her smile and ran into wokeness Read More »

The time I was surrounded by bank security

For three years of my undergrad Music Education study at the University of Kentucky, I rented one of five rooms the elderly landlady rented to college boys. Part of our rental agreement was that we would perform one task with her per month. That could be anything from driving her somewhere to assisting with her Christmas Cards.

Life at the Dagley house included an education UK could not match. She adjusted forever my dialect, diction, grammar and vocabulary.  I uncomfortably experienced how the élite deal with the ordinary, picked up breadcrumbs of how the rich keep, manage and spend money and cringed at her political prejudice and unapologetic racism.

This story is about one of those errands when I took her to the bank.

Bank withdrawalShe wanted to “cash” a check. She didn’t specify why….just handed me a money bag and an envelope for the teller. Imagine…. a college student approaching a bank teller with a nearly blind senior citizen woman, and handing the teller an envelope containing a check, a note to “cash it” with specific instructions of how many of each denomination – and a money bag. I was unaware of the amount of the check until the teller summoned security, which quickly, but politely, positioned around us. Can you say awkward moment? The exchange with the teller went something like this:

Teller: “Ma’am, are you sure you want to cash this….all of this?”

Dagley: “What does the note say?”

Teller: “Yes ma’am, but are you aware of the amount you are asking for?”

Dagley: “You mean the amount for which I am asking? (She was always correcting grammar and pronunciation). Is there confusion about the amount?”

I was not surprised that they were questioning her writing, especially if she wrote it out herself. More probable is that her attorney, a frequent visitor, wrote the check, and that her signature was all over it. When signing things, she would ask us to place the pen in the general area. Her signature was huge and never went in the intended direction.

Teller: Are you sure you have the right number of zeros?

Dagley: How many zeros do you see?

Teller: Ma’am that is ten thousand dollars.

Dagley: “Yes, it is. It is in my account and I want you to put it in this bag.”

Bank officer w/Security: “Miss Dagley, may we have a word with you?”

Dagley: “No. You may not. This is a simple transaction and I want you to complete it NOW.”

I never knew what she did with that $10,000 in cash.


This and more stories about My College Years with an Old Opera Singer HERE.

The time I was surrounded by bank security Read More »

Is it just me?

Is it just me? Yes, maintenance is often cheaper than waiting for something to break. But unless you really know your mechanics and mechanisms, and honest maintenance/repair people, you can be a victim. Sometimes I feel victimized.

Not all maintenance experiences are bad.

I sent my mower for maintenance instructing “do whatever it needs”. I expected certain things; oil change, oil and air filter and spark plug replacements, blades sharpened, and wheels aligned. I trusted the repair guy (a former student) and he charged me a reasonable amount, especially considering he picks it up and returns it.

There is a local auto shop I’m pleased with. They fix issues I know about and show me options for future consideration without needless pressure.

But then there are the oil change shops that want to “sell up”; filters tires, or a list of multi-hundred dollar recommended maintenance repairs.

Here’s the one that prompted this post.

Eleven months ago, my home air conditioner stopped. I couldn’t find the reason. I found a local business that had several positive recommendations. I called. He came. It was a capacitor, he replaced it and all was good. As we were settling up, he offered a $150 1-yr, 3-visit maintenance option; furnace, air conditioner and water heater. Sounded good. I signed up.

The first “check” was on my furnace. The tech said there was some “out of code” wiring and routing. It would cost $350 for the repair. The furnace could explode at any time. That should have been a red enough flag. I authorized the repair, however.

Today was check #2 — on my air conditioner, which, other than the part he replaced last year, has functioned perfectly. Today he found a part that, if I didn’t change, could cause the unit to not come on or not shut off. If I waited for that to happen, there would also be the cost of the service call on top of the nearly $300 to replace the part, which he happened to have with him.

As we were settling up, he asked two questions:

  1. When did I want to schedule the water heater check? I DID NOT. Not scheduled.
  2. Can he place a sign in my yard? NO!

Then I got a text (and also an email) asking for feedback.

DONE!

Is it just me? Read More »

You can’t say that

You can't say thatAccounts of recent separations of news personalities from their employers remind me of a time my boss told me,

“You can’t say that.”

Years ago, on a hot sunny mid-day, our high school was evacuated over a threat. One of my thoughts at the time was wondering what was going through the minds of those stopped in traffic as 1500+ students, teachers, and staff crossed the state highway en masse. After accounting for all the students who left class, we sat in the football stadium bleachers until the end of the school day when busses and parents picked up students from the stadium rather than the high school. The congestion and confusion on that side street was significant.

The afternoon was especially stressful to those who had to work through the safety protocols to ensure students left only with a legal guardian. How do you call the school when the school is evacuated? How and to whom are calls forwarded? And what about student records with parent/guardian names and information in an area without computers and connections? How do they sign out from a remote location? Parents were frustrated as everyone was trying to do the right thing in a setting we had never before experienced. I should note that the communication and information issues of that day were addressed.

My uncovered bald head was significantly sunburned in those nearly three hours. By the time I got home, my head hurt and I was angry, especially after learning all that was the result of one student’s prank. I made an ill-advised comment on personal social media that punishment should include affixing the offender to the schoolyard flag pole and allowing all who spent those 2-3 hours in the stadium sun file by to express thoughts of the experience.

I should not have said that and I deleted the post, but not before someone shared it with the building boss, who called me to his office the next day. With a copy of my post in his hand, he not-quite laughingly said that, although he might feel the same way, “you can’t say that”.

I wasn’t fired.

 

You can’t say that Read More »

Car technology meets Senior Citizenhood

Don’t think and hurt your brain

An original stupid personal experience story by John Gardner

Yes,

  • Many newer cars (including Joan’s) have key fobs with protection against locking key in car
  • My car does not (2012 Camry)
  • We usually travel in my car and are rarely together in hers
  • When I am taking her car for something, I know to put the key fob in my pocket. 
  • I’m not dumb, right?

 

But, for this last trip, where we were spending a week in her Dad’s area, we drove together in her car. We both had our key fobs on our persons. When I open the driver door, the seat adjusts to me. Cool. Push the start button, car starts. Perfect.

 

So this story happens as we are checking out of a hotel and getting in the car to take her dad to a surgery follow-up appointment. Without thinking, I had the key fob in a pocket that I loaded in the trunk as we were getting ready to go. 

 

As I close the trunk, CAR BEEPS … The reason didn’t register. Joan had already unlocked the car, helped her dad in … and when she gets in the passenger front, the beeping stops. The only weird thing was that the driver seat went to her setting. The reason didn’t register. I just pushed the seat button, adjusts. No problem. I get in… push the start button. Car starts. No problem, right?

 

We get to the hospital, I drop Joan and her dad off at the main door. She gets out of the car. CAR BEEPS…. The reason didn’t register. As she walks away, the beeping stops. 

 

I drive to a parking spot where I intend to wait for them. I push the button. Car shuts off, but beeps a couple times. I decide I want to turn the power on to keep charging my phone. Push the button. CAR BEEPS and power does NOT come on. I push the button to start the car. BEEPS. DEAD. Does NOT start. 

 

I call the car dealer service, describe a beep and no start and they tell me my battery is dead. Great. I’m out of state and know no auto businesses in the area. 

 

I search for a road service company that can at least come jump start me so I can get somewhere to get a new battery. Three people told me they couldn’t help me but Sandy’s Towing could. Call. Quoted $75 for a jump. Go. Driver will call when close.

 

THEN…. 

 

I realized my key fob was in the trunk. Ding. Car was trying to tell me not to lock it in the trunk. It was too far away to start the car. I get the fob, put it in my pocket, get back in the car, push the button…..engine starts. Wave off the jump-start driver and all is well. 

 

Duh….. 

 

Next car I get (mine is a 2012 and I’m approaching 80K miles….. Yeah. Anyway, my next car is going to have to give me warnings IN ENGLISH. Think I’ll find one?

Car technology meets Senior Citizenhood Read More »

Virginia Beach Music Festival and the 3rd Floor Balcony

The Virginia Beach Music Festival was a multi-day event that included competitions in Marching, Concert, Parade, Jazz, and Inspection. 

Normally a band year has multiple seasons. Summer and Fall are mostly Marching Band. Some competitions included an inspection element, which included standing at attention for about 15 minutes while someone went through with white gloves and inspected selected instruments and uniforms. Marching season transitions into Concert Band — and Jazz Band starts up. Late Spring and early Summer is parade season. 

To prepare for Virginia Beach, all that had to be going on simultaneously. 

During school, the concert band would rehearse. Jazz Band was after school and evenings were a combination of marching, parade and inspection practice.

The campus had a long driveway that we used, but would often go through a couple of the neighborhood blocks. Inspections involved Copenhaver’s paddle. We would stand at attention and he would walk in front of us, stopping to stare and to grab and check instruments. If anything was wrong, he’d say, “That’s one”, which meant he would get you with the paddle when he got behind you, which could be several minutes later. And if you moved when he whacked you, guess what. Right. I never got the paddle. 

The first time Holmes participated in 1969, (my Freshman year) Holmes was Grand Champion. We returned in 1970 as “Honor Band” for the event. 

Director Copenhaver was from Virginia and our two Greyhound busses stoped at a park near his hometown for a community-provided picnic. I remember one of the busses got stuck crossing a small creek. 

Two memorable events at the hotel we used. First, was one evening during the week when Mr. Copenhaver was in the parking lot and looked up at many of us on the balconies and said, 

“They know we’re here.”

Other than when actually winning an event, it was the happiest I recall him looking and sounding. 

The other was an evening when a group of seniors came knocking on our door. I was in a room with three other freshmen boys. They were there for “initiation”, which normally included some combination of ice down the underwear with shaving cream there and everywhere else — and then locked out of the room. 

The four of us (I think we all four), went over the balcony. The floors were close enough together that we could go from floor to floor…. Until we could jump to the ground. 

I can’t believe I did that. 

But I never experienced “initiation”. And I never did that to anyone else.

Virginia Beach Music Festival and the 3rd Floor Balcony Read More »